-At about the age of 4, a friend & I found a couple of Umbrellas in the
garbage and proceeded down the block to a tall shed that we could
both climb on top of. Both of us where going to jump off and parachute
to the ground on the count of three. One...Two...Three....Go!!! One of
us jumped, and one didn't. That really hurt.
-At about the age of 9, I would catch every crawling critter that I could.
I dove into a Caragana Bush after a snake, and caught a broken beer
bottle with the underside of my forearm. Glass 1/2 full? It didn't quite
come out through the top of my forearm. This wouldn't be my last
experience with broken beer bottles, but it was my first. Lots of
stitches. That really hurt.
-Later that summer, and still chasing snakes....I though I was going to
catch the granddaddy of all Garter Snakes. Biggest one I'd ever seen!
It wasn't a Garter Snake (& luckily it wasn't venomous, but it did have
a mouthful of sharp teeth) and it got me as I was getting it right between
my thumb and index finger, and it wouldn't let go. Eventually it did though.
Hand blew up like a balloon. Lots of shots later (Tetanus, Lockjaw, etc...),
and days later, my hand was back to normal. That really hurt.
-At about the age of 14, I was teaching myself how to use nunchucks.
The results where quite predictable in hindsight. I wish I'd owned a
helmet at that point, but I didn't. That really hurt.
-At about the age of 15, I was mastering the Catwalk on my bicycle.
I had a 12speed (& a BMX, but that's another story) with the handlebars
flipped upside-down. I could usually go about two blocks on the back
wheel. One time the chain came off mid-Catwalk...locking the rear
wheel up solid....and as the momentum brought the bike down back onto
two wheels....and the momentum carried me forward...my chest spread
my hands off the flipped up bars and I landed in a perfect three point
landing. Unfortunently the three points where the insides of both wrists
and the bottom of my chin and I skidded until my head turned and a
shoulder caught so I could start tumbling down the pavement. That
really hurt. lots of stitches. I've still got all of those scars.
-At about the age of 17, I went to break a beer bottle like they do in the
movies, leaving you with the bottom broken off and a jaged edged
weapon. In the movies, they never show that the bottle breaks where
you're holding it. Lots of stitches. That really hurt.
-At about the age of 19, I had a really crappy can opener that would
sort of mostly open most cans. Full of testosterone, I would grip the lid
and just rip the lid the rest of the way off the can. It worked about a 100
times before, until the time that it didn't. Frozen juice lubricated that lid
and my grip wasn't so good....and I almost lost a thumb. Lots of
stitches. That really hurt.
-At about the age of 30, I was drilling a hole in a Quarter (long story...)
and the clamp wasn't strong enough to hold the coin in place. I was
though, and clamped that coin down with my thumb. Most of the way
through that coin with the drill (this was the second coin...it work well
the first time) with most of my weight on top of the hand-drill, the drill
bit snapped. Worst was having to reverse the drill to try and slowly
back that broken drill bit out of the countertop via my thumb. Clean
though the thumb (through the thumb nail too). Having a Doctor try
to stuff the meat back through the hole in the Thumbnail with a little
wooden dowel so he could seal it with a surgical glue was worse
than any of the many broken bones that I've experienced to date.
That really hurt.
I know this is only 8 things, but it's an edited list of the dumbest....
