wow. It never fails to amaze me how common decency becomes the first casualty of forum interaction.
Death is rarely about the deceased. They're gone, what the hell do they care who says what about them? In the end, their lives will be defined by how they lived them anyway.
No, the aftermath that accompanies death isn't about the dead. They're done. It's about the living.... the ones left behind who are in the midst of grief. Anyone who's had to learn how to take the next step of their lives with a gaping hole where a loved one used to be will immediately recall how surreal and raw that time is. Comments like I've read here serve no positive purpose but to pour salt on fresh wounds.
Think the family and friends of these people won't stumble upon the comments I've read here? I wouldn't want to take that chance, and I'm shocked anyone would.
Grief is the same for all of us - it's possibly one of the most painful experiences any of us will ever go through. And even the most insensitive person I know wouldn't make a point of saying any of the horrid things that I've read here in the presence of fresh grief in real life. So why is it suddenly ok behind a cloak of anonymity? Is that the only thin line that separates us from being complete assholes??
There are people in this world I don't like. Yet I can't fathom going to a place where people are gathered to remember them for the sole purpose of dissing them. Never mind how disrespectful it is to the dead - it's disrespectful to their living loved ones. More than that, it's just damn cruel.
Some people need to give their heads a shake before they hit submit. You don't have to utter out loud or in print every nasty thought that crawls across your mind.
As for gerry - I know his style is to play devil's advocate, and I've yet to see this tactic play out the way he intends, but I respect his motives on this issue - like it or not you guys, he's completely right. A double standard is a double standard no matter how you try and justify it.
. I got the ph thing figured out.
