Forgiveness - Different for everyone

[damngrumpy]

There is only one small confusion here, forgiveness should not be confused with
what we call justice. Forgiveness does not mean one should escape the over all
responsibility for what they have done. Justice and forgiveness therefore are two
different things. One can say from the heart as it were, there is no malice toward
that individual, however the offender like BTK is still going to spend the rest of
their life in jail.
If someone is caught and put on trial, found guilty and sentenced to life in prison
or execution and they are put away, why the hell would I waste my time hating
them or even giving them another thought for that matter. If we subscribe to that
these people and their evil deeds live on in the societies mind and that is not a
principle of justice.
If we take the position that forgiveness allows us to move on the offenders are then
condemned to silence and their deeds are forgotten in the vast pages of history
and that is far worse for those offenders, because their main focus was to be
remembered, by forgiveness and putting them out of our minds, they are isolated
in theirs the exact opposite of what the were striving for. That is the way I see it
anyway, maybe I'm wrong but I am not going to waste my time on earth giving
them a stage for remembrance or immortality, and by reviling and hating them they
get the recognition they don't deserve

 

[Cliffy]

Joe Cartoon - Gerbil in a Light Socket - YouTube

 

[Goober]

There is only one small confusion here, forgiveness should not be confused with
what we call justice. Forgiveness does not mean one should escape the over all
responsibility for what they have done. Justice and forgiveness therefore are two
different things. One can say from the heart as it were, there is no malice toward
that individual, however the offender like BTK is still going to spend the rest of
their life in jail.

DG - It is amazing how and what splits families apart. I have noted that over the years. One is a poorly planned will. Then fights start over the worst way you would ever receive money - someone has to die. Or spouses cannot get along with another family members spouse. And shxt starts over what is at times really not that important - but grows like a wildfire, on a dry day with a strong wind. Consumes all and any that comes into contact with it.

 

[Cliffy]

The main thing that is wrong with the human race is people.

 

[shadowshiv]

If someone ever murdered someone that I love(especially a family member), there is no way I would ever forgive them.

 

[JLM]

If someone ever murdered someone that I love(especially a family member), there is no way I would ever forgive them.

You got that right! :smile:

 

[Cliffy]

If someone ever murdered someone that I love(especially a family member), there is no way I would ever forgive them.

I'm not sure if forgive is the right word here. But somehow we have to let go of the anger and hate because they will eat us up inside and ruin our lives. And in the end, I doubt that anybody, especially the lost loved one, would want us to suffer on their account.

A good friend died on Friday. He suffered from the side effects of diabetes. Kept loosing body parts. I don't grieve for my lose, instead I celebrate that he no longer suffers and that Friday morning, when we had coffee together, he still had his incredible sense of humour.

 

[JLM]

I'm not sure if forgive is the right word here. But somehow we have to let go of the anger and hate because they will eat us up inside and ruin our lives. And in the end, I doubt that anybody, especially the lost loved one, would want us to suffer on their account.

A good friend died on Friday. He suffered from the side effects of diabetes. Kept loosing body parts. I don't grieve for my lose, instead I celebrate that he no longer suffers and that Friday morning, when we had coffee together, he still had his incredible sense of humour.

Sorry about the loss of your friend, Cliff.

 

[shadowshiv]

I'm not sure if forgive is the right word here. But somehow we have to let go of the anger and hate because they will eat us up inside and ruin our lives. And in the end, I doubt that anybody, especially the lost loved one, would want us to suffer on their account.

A good friend died on Friday. He suffered from the side effects of diabetes. Kept loosing body parts. I don't grieve for my lose, instead I celebrate that he no longer suffers and that Friday morning, when we had coffee together, he still had his incredible sense of humour.

I'm not sure if I could let go of the anger and the hate. Seeing the person standing across from me, still alive while my loved one is dead an buried(or missing), would not sit right with me.

And my condolences on the loss of your friend.

 

[Cliffy]

I'm not sure if I could let go of the anger and the hate. Seeing the person standing across from me, still alive while my loved one is dead an buried(or missing), would not sit right with me.

And my condolences on the loss of your friend.

Ben was a big man, Chippewa Indian. He was always teasing the girls at the coffee shop. One of the girls' husband had been away for 6 months working up north and was coming home for Christmas. Ben says to her, "I don't want you showing up here looking like you been hit by a mayonnaise truck."
Man, a lot of coffee got sprayed across the table with that one.

 

[Ariadne]

Seems like more about unforgiveness than forgiveness.

I always found forgiveness to have a bit of a twist ... you were never sure if it was deserved. For example, if someone has wronged you and says "I'm sorry", but it happens again, that suggests that the apology was insincere and that forgiveness was prematrue.

On the other hand, forgiveness is required for healing.