Response to Canada's Downing of US Plane

[EagleSmack]

Attention

All Canadian Members of Canadian Content

I am the Supreme Commander of all US Forces on Canadian Content
(SACUSFCANCON)

In light of recent events in New York regarding the Canadian downing of US Airways Flt 1549 from NY LaGuardia to Charlotte NC I make the following demands.

1. The return of ALL Leaders of CANADIAN GEESE flocks (Alpha Males and Females) to the United States, to which they will be transported to Guantanamo Cuba for further interogation.

2. The expatriation of 1,000,000 Canadians to clean up Canadian Goose excrement from all Golf Courses, waterways, parks, natural or man-made lake fronts (ponds included), and open grassy areas.

3. The IMMEDIATE grounding and CESSATION of all future Canadian Geese flights.

4. The IMMEDIATE institution of a NO Canadian Geese FLYZONE 300 KMs above and below the US-Canadian Border.

5. An establishment of a watchlist of KNOWN Canadian Geese operating within the borders of the United States.

6. The construction of a pipeline SOLELY for the transfer of Canadian Maple Syrup to the United States

7. Canada WILL submit the SECRET RECIPE for Canadian Bacon to SACUSFCANCON IMMEDIATLY (if not sooner)

I have posted this in the business thread because I MEAN BUSINESS!

 

[EagleSmack]

Aditional Demands...

8. Canada will deliver the CANCON Member known as Praxius to Orlando Florida for reeducation at Disney World.

9. CANCON WILL Declare EagleSmack the WINNER of the "Last Person to Post Wins" thread.

 

[Praxius]

Attention

All Canadian Members of Canadian Content

I am the Supreme Commander of all US Forces on Canadian Content
(SACUSFCANCON)

In light of recent events in New York regarding the Canadian downing of US Airways Flt 1549 from NY LaGuardia to Charlotte NC I make the following demands.

1. The return of ALL Leaders of CANADIAN GEESE flocks (Alpha Males and Females) to the United States, to which they will be transported to Guantanamo Cuba for further interogation.

As Assistant Director Supreme Overlord of the Royal Canadian Bird Flew Feather Force (RCBFFF) ~ Request denied.

You may send us a list of names you suspect were involved in the attack and we will determine based on your evidence and intelligence whether or not sending our troops to you for your own legal actions is justified.

2. The expatriation of 1,000,000 Canadians to clean up Canadian Goose excrement from all Golf Courses, waterways, parks, natural or man-made lake fronts (ponds included), and open grassy areas.

Request will be met if 2,000,000 Americans come to Canada to clean up all the Pigeon Fecal Matter that has accumulated over the centuries....... while our evidence is still being collected, signs are pointing towards the greater majority of our Pigeons coming from the US. If you can not prove with factual evidence that all the fecal matter you wish to be cleaned actually came from geese, then it would be a good show of faith in our country's relationships for you to send people to do the same for our nation.

3. The IMMEDIATE grounding and CESSATION of all future Canadian Geese flights.

Request Denied.

Until our investigations are complete, we will restrict our flights to our air space unless an emergency situation occurs. While I respect that your nation needs to defend it's airspace, it would be unwise for us to ground all of our air force at the request of a forign nation that holds no jurisdiction.

4. The IMMEDIATE institution of a NO Canadian Geese FLYZONE 300 KMs above and below the US-Canadian Border.

Request Denied.

We require air security in all of our nation's airspace. With the use of UAV's by the US along the border in recent months, it would be a threat to our national security if we allowed this amount of area of our nation to go un patrolled by our own forces.

5. An establishment of a watchlist of KNOWN Canadian Geese operating within the borders of the United States.

Request Denied due to National Security.

6. The construction of a pipeline SOLELY for the transfer of Canadian Maple Syrup to the United States

There is no justification for this request...... Request Denied.

7. Canada WILL submit the SECRET RECIPE for Canadian Bacon to SACUSFCANCON IMMEDIATLY (if not sooner)

Once again, There is no justification for this request...... Request Denied.

I have posted this in the business thread because I MEAN BUSINESS!

As Assistant Director Supreme Overlord of the Royal Canadian Bird Flew Feather Force (RCBFFF), I take this as a direct threat apon the Nation of Canada. I am now ordering all of our diplomats from US territory and to return back to the Coldland (Homeland in your language) Until we reach a resolution to this crisis.

If any military action is taken apon our nation or any of its citizens, we will respond with brute force and have no other choice but to Feather-Flock your nation into extinction like the Do-Do.

 

[Praxius]

Aditional Demands...

8. Canada will deliver the CANCON Member known as Praxius to Orlando Florida for reeducation at Disney World.

Due to short timing in finding a replacement..... and being me you're talking about..... Request Denied. (I'll bite down on my cyanide tooth before I enter that hell hole and you damn well know it :angry3: )

9. CANCON WILL Declare EagleSmack the WINNER of the "Last Person to Post Wins" thread.

We may be able to see about that being done.

 

[EagleSmack]

As Assistant Director Supreme Overlord of the Royal Canadian Bird Flew Feather Force (RCBFFF) ~ Request denied.

You may send us a list of names you suspect were involved in the attack and we will determine based on your evidence and intelligence whether or not sending our troops to you for your own legal actions is justified.

A list will be drawn up and RCBFFF WILL deliver these CANADIAN Geese personally before he is brought before the Supreme Mouse.

Request will be met if 2,000,000 Americans come to Canada to clean up all the Pigeon Fecal Matter that has accumulated over the centuries....... while our evidence is still being collected, signs are pointing towards the greater majority of our Pigeons coming from the US. If you can not prove with factual evidence that all the fecal matter you wish to be cleaned actually came from geese, then it would be a good show of faith in our country's relationships for you to send people to do the same for our nation.

PREPOSTEROUS! It is well known the amount of excrement that is dropped by Bird Geese Canadian (by it's military nomenclature). Canada will send these people forthwith. Furthermore a percentage of Canadians will be made up from Canadian Members of CANCON.

Request Denied.

Until our investigations are complete, we will restrict our flights to our air space unless an emergency situation occurs. While I respect that your nation needs to defend it's airspace, it would be unwise for us to ground all of our air force at the request of a forign nation that holds no jurisdiction.

By the actions of rogue elements of the RCBFFF all flights will cease.

Request Denied.

We require air security in all of our nation's airspace. With the use of UAV's by the US along the border in recent months, it would be a threat to our national security if we allowed this amount of area of our nation to go un patrolled by our own forces.

How dare you! UAV flights WILL continue AND Canada will allow deeper penetration of US UAV's into Canadian Air Space.

There is no justification for this request...... Request Denied.

THIS IS AN OUTRAGE! Canada WILL deliver BILLIONS of Gallons of Maple Syrup to the breakfast tables of all Americans (Except Gopher) post haste!

Once again, There is no justification for this request...... Request Denied.

ANOTHER SLAP! Canada WILL deliver the recipe for IMMEDIATE production of EAGLESMACK BACON (formerly known as Canadian Bacon)

As Assistant Director Supreme Overlord of the Royal Canadian Bird Flew Feather Force (RCBFFF), I take this as a direct threat apon the Nation of Canada. I am now ordering all of our diplomats from US territory and to return back to the Coldland (Homeland in your language) Until we reach a resolution to this crisis.

If any military action is taken apon our nation or any of its citizens, we will respond with brute force and have no other choice but to Feather-Flock your nation into extinction like the Do-Do.

These are my demands...

They WILL be met

Furthermore...the Asst Director of the RCBFFF will report to Disney World's Magic Kingdom for Mouse Ear fitting and will be sentenced to ride "It's a Small World" 100 times in a row. Believe me...riding that once is torture.

 

[Praxius]

A list will be drawn up and RCBFFF WILL deliver these CANADIAN Geese personally before he is brought before the Supreme Mouse.

If there are gounds for each individual to be extradited, it will be done.

However, due to national security once again, I will not be handed over. This decision has also been confirmed by Master Director Supreme Overlord of the RCBFFF.....

Mr. Dressup

PREPOSTEROUS! It is well known the amount of excrement that is dropped by Bird Geese Canadian (by it's military nomenclature). Canada will send these people forthwith. Furthermore a percentage of Canadians will be made up from Canadian Members of CANCON.

While I have no objections of sending a couple of members from here I don't like to the US, the amount of fecal matter from Canadian Geese in the US is questionable, considering the various levels of other bird species that live withn the US and whom all share the same locations in the US. What you may determine as Canadian Geese Fecal Matter (CGFM) could also be from other birds such as ducks, robins, blue jays, crows, seagulls, etc.

Until further evidence is provided, request denied.

By the actions of rogue elements of the RCBFFF all flights will cease.

Denied.

We do not take orders from forign nations or their governments in regards to Canadian Operations of National Security, based on their flawed intelligence. You got Iraq wrong, Iran wrong and Afghanistan wrong..... chances are, you got this wrong as well.

How dare you! UAV flights WILL continue AND Canada will allow deeper penetration of US UAV's into Canadian Air Space.

If one UAV crosses into Canadian air space, they will be shot down by our A-A pellet guns...... and we will pump them so damn high with pressure that our arms will burn....... don't even tempt us.

THIS IS AN OUTRAGE! Canada WILL deliver BILLIONS of Gallons of Maple Syrup to the breakfast tables of all Americans (Except Gopher) post haste!

You are not in a position to demand. We will not send you one drop of Maple Syrup (except through typical capitalistic methods already approved) for no reason at all.

For all we know, those alleged Canadian Geese could have been spray painted swans, disguised as Canadian Geese for some US excuse to take military action to steal our oil sands, fresh water, uranium, lumber and maple syrup. Swans would explain the weight of the birds reported.

ANOTHER SLAP! Canada WILL deliver the recipe for IMMEDIATE production of EAGLESMACK BACON (formerly known as Canadian Bacon)

Keep this up and it'll be a kick to the nnnnnnn'ads

These are my demands...

They WILL be met

Furthermore...the Asst Director of the RCBFFF will report to Disney World's Magic Kingdom for Mouse Ear fitting and will be sentenced to ride "It's a Small World" 100 times in a row. Believe me...riding that once is torture.

This continual disrespect and demands in the attitude that we are a part of your nation are insulting. Until you learn how to approach this crisis in a diplomatic fashion and allow for a two-way negotiation, this conversation is over, there will be no deals and the US can take all their nukes, all their navy fleet and all their military and cram it!

 

[GreenFish66]

As much as we try to separate ourselves from nature and this earth ..We are constantly reminded that we are ALL very affected and influenced by it...You can blame the birds for a miraculous landing, but you can't blame the birds for humans flying.....Great landing and action by a great pilot /attendants and the whole crew as they acted as one team, to overcome , what could have been a disasterous event....I salute all on flight 1549!!...Amazing....

 

[Praxius]

As much as we try to separate ourselves from natural we are still all..very affected by it...You can blame the birds for a miraculous landing but you can't blame the birds for humans flying.....Great landing and action by a great pilot /attendants and the whole crew as they acted as one team to overcome a possibly disasterous event....I salute you all!!...Amazing....

I would have lit up a big blunt and nose dived the thing.... Moooo Hooo Haw haw haw!!!

And this is why I am not a pilot.... or that's what they told me at the academy.

 

[Ron in Regina]

Prax & Smack.....perhaps Egypt can assist the two of you in negotiating a settlement
against the escalading posturing before this trips into outright hostilities, and we start
lobbing frozen bird carcasses into each others air space...:?:8O:?:

 

[EagleSmack]

Prax & Smack.....perhaps Egypt can assist the two of you in negotiating a settlement
against the escalading posturing before this trips into outright hostilities, and we start
lobbing frozen bird carcasses into each others air space...:?:8O:?:

The only way I will accept any Egyptian moderation is under the condition that they build me a pyramid that dwarfs the pyramids of Giza on the Canadian side of Niagra Falls and a Sphinx with the image of DarkBeaver.

 

[EagleSmack]

As much as we try to separate ourselves from nature and this earth ..We are constantly reminded that we are ALL very affected and influenced by it...You can blame the birds for a miraculous landing, but you can't blame the birds for humans flying.....Great landing and action by a great pilot /attendants and the whole crew as they acted as one team, to overcome , what could have been a disasterous event....I salute all on flight 1549!!...Amazing....

As inspiring as this may be... I still don't see how this banter is going to get my Maple Syrup Pipeline built.

 

[Socrates the Greek]

All the people on that plane were good, and karma (or God) left them alone and didn't harm them.

 

[Praxius]

Prax & Smack.....perhaps Egypt can assist the two of you in negotiating a settlement
against the escalading posturing before this trips into outright hostilities, and we start
lobbing frozen bird carcasses into each others air space...:?:8O:?:

Not unless the US builds me a Pyramid......

Chop Chop.

 

[Praxius]

The only way I will accept any Egyptian moderation is under the condition that they build me a pyramid that dwarfs the pyramids of Giza on the Canadian side of Niagra Falls and a Sphinx with the image of DarkBeaver.

Damit, he beat me to it.... those bastards have my room bugged, I knew it!!! :evil:

That's the last straw..... *storms off to the command centre*

 

[EagleSmack]

Not unless the US builds me a Pyramid......

Chop Chop.

Prax... your monument will be a simple figure on the Canadian section of "It's a Small World" and that is that. :smile:

YouTube - Disney 2008 Its a Small World Canada