So was I. I never took Zyban but quit about 30 times.....Once I quit for almost two months........I went out for a drink with some friends, at least half of whom smoked.......... After a few beers I thought.......one won't hurt........I was back to over a pack a day very quickly.
I finally quit for good about thirty years ago. I quit cold turkey.......I think I wanted to quit. Never started again.
I believed I was a lifer and had no intention of trying to quit. No one was more surprised than I. My friends who still smoked back then were shocked because I was the "heavy" compared to them.
If I could have smoked the way they did (six to 8 a day) I likely would never have quit but my habit just kept increasing. I would smoke from the time I got out of the shower in the morning until I went to bed at night. If I woke up, I got up for a cigarette.
I was also shocked at how fast my lungs pinked up. Apparently though they are larger than they should be. That may cause problems down the road.