Boss's who have sex with subordinates.

Vancouverdude

New Member
Nov 29, 2014
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As the title suggests:

Just 3 days ago the HR Manager at my work, who is also a good friend of mine confessed she's been sleeping with the boss (also my direct superior) both are married.

I didn't ask for any details, and told her that it was completely inappropriate for this to be happening, and particularly because of her position she needs to either end the affair immediately, or one of them resign. She says she wants to end things, but has to tread carefully as she knows how vindictive he is. (I think her saying that alone makes it clear, while the affair may seem consensual, she's consented only out of fear of saying no and losing her job).

My question is what the heck do I do? As a friend I've told her she needs to make a decision, and on a personal level, I think that's the right thing to say. But what about professionally? Our Corporate Office has a very specific code-of-conduct and while no specific "dating" policy exists, there is no shortage of conflict of interest regulations, including employing family and/or people with whom you have a romantic/sexual relationship as direct reports, etc.

If this was an affair between two co-workers, or even the boss and a Manager in any other department besides HR, I wouldn't care at all. But HR? blows my mind any reasonably intelligent person would get close to crossing that line.

I'm very torn, mostly because my opinion of my boss, who I've considered a mentor, someone who speaks so regularly about honor and integrity has been absolutely shattered.

Would love to hear any comments...
 

WLDB

Senate Member
Jun 24, 2011
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Ottawa
As the others said, nothing. Business as usual. I suppose you could report them but being at the most junior level of the three that might not go so well for you.
 

Vancouverdude

New Member
Nov 29, 2014
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The lowest nose in the business is the least costly to punch. Unless help is asked for, I'd stay out of it. You're in too far already
I took the confession and the puddles of tears in my office as asking for help. I completely agree, it's none of my business, and would have preferred to not be told at all.
 

lone wolf

Grossly Underrated
Nov 25, 2006
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In the bush near Sudbury
I took the confession and the puddles of tears in my office as asking for help. I completely agree, it's none of my business, and would have preferred to not be told at all.
The Men-from-Mars-Women-From-Venus set will probably tell you she just wanted to vent - not a fix. Who knows ... but it's an easy out for you