Being a man

[s_lone]

What does it mean to be a man? I'm talking about the male sex, not about being a human.

We often hear people say ''Come on! Be a man!'' as if being a man is about something very precise. What is manliness beyond having a penis and more facial hair?

What is manly and what is not? And why is that so?

Can a 'real' man be a kindergarden teacher? Can a real man be a stay-at-home dad while mommy brings back the cash? Can a real man be homosexual?

 

[karrie]

There's nothing logical in the description
No way to explain the sensation
It's a visceral, tribal, hormonal beat
A strumming, humming within that says
'There's a man'


It's a firmness, a strength
An anchoring of those around you
It allows a 'man' to be anything he wants
With no fear of being less
Just a man

 

[Walter]

70's psychobabble. I'm still trying to 'find myself'. If you have a penis and have passed puberty you are a man.

 

[s_lone]

There's nothing logical in the description
No way to explain the sensation
It's a visceral, tribal, hormonal beat
A strumming, humming within that says
'There's a man'


It's a firmness, a strength
An anchoring of those around you
It allows a 'man' to be anything he wants
With no fear of being less
Just a man

And women can't feel that 'thing'?

 

[karrie]

I know some women who are 'manlier'... more commanding, stronger, and a better base of support for a family unit... than some of the males I know. I know a few women who are real men. :lol:

 

[s_lone]

I know some women who are 'manlier'... more commanding, stronger, and a better base of support for a family unit... than some of the males I know. I know a few women who are real men. :lol:

I understand very well what you are saying, but does that mean men are expected to be strong while women aren't?

Would you look at a male kindergarden teacher and think ''that guy musn't be much of a man''...?

 

[karrie]

Nope. It doesn't hinge on physical strength. It can be part of it, but that's not all of it, and a man can be a man without it. And like I said at the beginning, a guy with that 'something' can be whatever he wants, without seeming un-manly... a gay kindergarten teacher who dances ballet in his spare time, can still be manly. It's just hard to describe what that something is

 

[EastSideScotian]

Your pretty much have to have poor grammer and think you know everything.....I got that down pat.....

Really...I do

 

[s_lone]

a gay kindergarten teacher who dances ballet in his spare time, can still be manly. It's just hard to describe what that something is

Is it strength of character? Vitality? Or does 'being a man' mean nothing at all?

 

[EastSideScotian]

Is it strength of character? Vitality?

I would say yes...STand up for the right things...stand up for your opinon...and live by your word and let your actions do most the talking.......

 

[karrie]

Yes and yes. And no and not really. It's a lot of things I think.

:lol:

 

[s_lone]

Your pretty much have to have poor grammer and think you know everything.....I got that down pat.....

Really...I do

EastSideScotian, you're in the army right? Have you worked with women? Have you met women who are 'manlier' than men? And what does that mean?

 

[s_lone]

The point I'm trying to get to with this thread is this:

In our society where we supposedly value equality between sexes, is the term 'manly' sexist?

 

[EastSideScotian]

EastSideScotian, you're in the army right? Have you worked with women? Have you met women who are 'manlier' than men? And what does that mean?

I have worked with Woman yes...I have met some woman...girls alike who act Manlier jokes, farting, trying to be one of the guys....I wouldnt say they are Manlier Physically or Mentally...I think they just take on the "manley" streyotype.

I guess a truly Manley female would contain physical likeness and actions, which I guess I have met they were also lesbians, also I dont know if they were Manlier than men...I have meet some womanly men though...

I think we are just thinking about our Ideas of what a man is and a woman is...and then throwing them on well the opposites...Maybe its all just an idea?

 

[karrie]

Yes, it's sexist. It's a hormonal and behavioral description, based on a collection of attributes found to be desirable in a male in our current society, both for work and familial purposes.

It's the epitome of sexist.

 

[Unforgiven]

Interesting question. Mostly subjective I suppose but I would suggest that it's got to do with doing whats right regardless of who is looking and knowing when it is better to do what is good than to be right.

Keeping your head when others are losing theirs, acting like a leader when needed and a follower when it's best. To know when to be sensitive and to act accordingly, and to learn form your experiences so that in future you can accept the benefit of that lesson.

Caring for those who find themselves helpless, and standing up against those who would harm others to the detriment of all.

A man knows how to be exactly what he needs to be and has the sense to act accordingly.

 

[EastSideScotian]

The point I'm trying to get to with this thread is this:

In our society where we supposedly value equality between sexes, is the term 'manly' sexist?

I would say no because Manley is how one would act......just like a girl would act girly...Manley would be more inclined towards things geared for men...and girly is being more inclined for things for women...And actting how we know woman to act...and how we know men to act......It isnt really sexist...its just an action and a lifestyle

 

[karrie]

I would say no because Manley is how one would act......just like a girl would act girly...Manley would be more inclined towards things geared for men...and girly is being more inclined for things for women...And actting how we know woman to act...and how we know men to act......It isnt really sexist...its just an action and a lifestyle

You know, disagreeing with me on your first day back just doesn't make a good impression. Watch it or I'll have to get all manly and threaten you. GGgggrrrrr....

*gives Scotian the evil eye before cracking up laughing 'cause I can only act mean for a moment*

 

[EastSideScotian]

Question then for you Karrie... you posted this in another thread...not to steal from it just to kinda see why or why not this post is sexist

Whoo.... I'm envisioning some virtual chest bumps going on here. Many hearty back smacking hugs and such. Manly men greeting one another in manly ways. The Tim Allen man grunt would seem appropriate here, but I don't know how to type it without it coming out pirate!

As you can see you pinned us as Manly...i dont mind nor do the others I am sure...and evrything you listed are "manly" actions. How you percevive men to act agreed...its just an action...nothing to be a sexist term...just a catagory of how one would act..

 

[s_lone]

I would say no because Manley is how one would act......just like a girl would act girly...Manley would be more inclined towards things geared for men...and girly is being more inclined for things for women...And actting how we know woman to act...and how we know men to act......It isnt really sexist...its just an action and a lifestyle

If your son was obviously and naturally more inclined to play with dolls and play 'girly' games, would you be worried about the future manliness of your child?