To have children or not?

[nitzomoe]

RE: To have children or n

call it youthful ignorance but I dont plan on having any kids either, at least for a very long time. theres soo much to do before one must settle down and have a family.

Personally I want to travel through all 7 continents, get to the point in my career I always aspire to, and get a really fancy car that I would never drive except during the summer and on weekends. then ill think about it.

 

[DasFX]

Re: RE: To have children or n

call it youthful ignorance but I dont plan on having any kids either, at least for a very long time. theres soo much to do before one must settle down and have a family.

Personally I want to travel through all 7 continents, get to the point in my career I always aspire to, and get a really fancy car that I would never drive except during the summer and on weekends. then ill think about it.

To each his own, but it is invariable impossible to have it all within our human life expectancy. From how you phase your statement, it seems that you view children as a limiting factor. Good luck anyhow.

 

[LindzyRae]

I do not want to have children. However I may decide to become a foster parent down the road at some point. Not untill I am a bit older though, and my wander-lust has mellowed a bit.

 

[nitzomoe]

Re: RE: To have children or n

call it youthful ignorance but I dont plan on having any kids either, at least for a very long time. theres soo much to do before one must settle down and have a family.

Personally I want to travel through all 7 continents, get to the point in my career I always aspire to, and get a really fancy car that I would never drive except during the summer and on weekends. then ill think about it.

To each his own, but it is invariable impossible to have it all within our human life expectancy. From how you phase your statement, it seems that you view children as a limiting factor. Good luck anyhow.

If i hafta sacrifice the car I'll do it then!

 

[unclepercy]

Well, I absolutely feel that people who cannot afford to support children - should NOT have them. If they have to be on the dole,
then -no- children would be best. I have 2 and wouldn't take a million dollars for them.

Uncle

 

[the caracal kid]

i won't have kids, they are not of any interest to me. I will be upfront and say they are a burden of many sorts i have no need or want for. To each his/her own. Some want kids, some prefer other ventures.

 

[JomZ]

A lot of friends and family of mine chose not too have kids and have chosen too lead their life for themselves.

Some of them I know have absolutely no regrets about that and some do. It happens as you become older and realize that you don't have a legacy to leave behind. (I wouldnt know since Im one of the younger members on this board)

On the flip side there are some people who had kids, either intentionally or unintentionally, who sometimes ponder the road not travelled.

I for one can not wait till I have kids, but that will not happen until I meet Mrs. JomZ

 

[zoofer]

Lurking around looking for any maidens in distress because they have not been deflowered and are not expecting.. :wink:

No ladies should have to suffer so. So with a bit of practice I am sure we can eventually succeed in fulfilling your
hearts desires.

Lurk lurk...
Maybe I will go lurk in the newby section. I hear a lot of hot babes just joined..... 8)

 

[Cosmo]

Lurking around looking for any maidens in distress because they have not been deflowered and are not expecting.. :wink:

No ladies should have to suffer so. So with a bit of practice I am sure we can eventually succeed in fulfilling your
hearts desires.

Lurk lurk...
Maybe I will go lurk in the newby section. I hear a lot of hot babes just joined..... 8)

Zoof ... you look particularly dashing in that trench coat! Do we need to turn the cold hose on you yet? The chicks here may not have been sufficiently warned about Dr. Z!!!

 

[Curiosity]

Cosmo

Hi there - can't we get Zoofer some new lines? He's gonna scare the women away! :wink:

I like this topic and while I was reading all the different ideas being given pro and con, two things struck me...

(1) How some people live a bit for themselves, and think maybe or even maybe not and some have plans other than parenthood for their lives....and all feel pretty good with their decisions....about having children in the future or are wild about the children they have... there's a lot of love floating around about kids which is wonderful to read....even from the people who don't want that responsibility for themselves.

(2) And because I believe no child should be born who can't be loved, provided for and especially who isn't wanted... I think we
are all very fortunate these days...because we have a choice.

 

[Cosmo]

RE: To have children or n

Wednesday's Child ... seems like Zoof does quite well with his current collection of lines! I think the women around here are fully equipped to handle his flirtatious nature ... in fact a few of them will give him a run for his money!

Back to topic ... I never wanted children, never wanted to share my toys or be that responsible for another human being's welfare, spirit and moral development. It's an enormous job and because I wasn't entirely certain I was up to the task, chose not to take it on.

I have a great deal of respect for people who have children. It has got to be the single most difficult undertaking in the world if one is determined to do a good job. I know how insanely protective I am of my jack russell ... I can't begin to imagine how difficult it would be to raise a child and send it out into the world. I have trouble letting my dog off leash! Takes a different kind of character than I possess to strike that balance between giving "roots and wings" to another person.

Kudos to those that can do it, and kudos to those of us who know our limitations and don't get sucked into the overwhelming societal pressure to have children.

 

[bhoour]

Re: RE: To have children or n

call it youthful ignorance but I dont plan on having any kids either, at least for a very long time. theres soo much to do before one must settle down and have a family.

Personally I want to travel through all 7 continents, get to the point in my career I always aspire to, and get a really fancy car that I would never drive except during the summer and on weekends. then ill think about it.

That was my plan, but you know, um.......stuff happens. Usually for a reason.

keep it wrapped !


I'll have to travel as a senior.

:wink:

 

[Frappuccino Dibs]

I have one son who is now 2 years old. He's been on holiday abroad with us I think 5 times.

Having kids does not stop you travelling it just makes you re-evaluate the places you go to for a few years.

Personally, I think kids are great and in my little world, nothing has been more rewarding than watching my son grow up.

I understand why people would say they don't want kids, but I think they are denying themselves something that is immensly rewarding.

 

[bhoour]

I have one son who is now 2 years old. He's been on holiday abroad with us I think 5 times.

Having kids does not stop you travelling it just makes you re-evaluate the places you go to for a few years.
up.

.

Having kids does stop me from travelling, because I am not in a position financially, to take all 3 with me. So, how do I choose which child is worthy, and who watches the other two while I'm gone? As mine are over two yrs the expense is great. Many of the places I'd like to go are, not kid oriented, and it would be unfair to take them to a place like that.
We go on lots of road trips and camp alot......the poor (wo)mans holiday.

 

[pastafarian]

Coupla thoughts.

I have two, 5 and 10. Not accidents, surprises :wink: .

Can't think of anything that screws up your life worse than children. It's tiring, stressful and bloody inconvenient... I wouldn't trade parenthood for anything!!! My little apes are the best thing that's ever happened to me.

I don't think people who choose not to have children are making a mistake, or are being "selfish". In fact, it's a ridiculous idea.

You have to give up a lot of stuff to be a decent parent (and IMO, there's nothing worse than a lousy parent). The world doesn't need any more humans, so it's certainly not an obligation.

Also, no one's ever ready to be a parent: any sane person who looks at the prospect rationally has no choice but to run from the idea, screaming.

So far, my view is that you don't need to know anything to be a decent parent: you'll learn it when it's too late. All you need is to put in the time in good faith, with an open mind and a willingness to learn at least twice as much from your kids as you're prepared to teach them.

It's a lot of fun, too!

 

[Toro]

RE: To have children or n

I don't think you can truly understand love until you have children.

 

[tracy]

I work with a lot of parents who clearly regret their decision to have kids. It's heartbreaking. IMO, no one should have children because they want someone to love them, they want to leave a legacy, they want someone to take care of them when they are older or they are worried they'll regret it if they don't.

 

[the caracal kid]

indeed tracy,

if you want someone to love you, get a cat.
if you want leave a legacy, build something memorable.
if you want someone to care for you in old age, plan for hiring such staff.

 

[tracy]

Re: RE: To have children or not?

indeed tracy,

if you want someone to love you, get a cat.
if you want leave a legacy, build something memorable.
if you want someone to care for you in old age, plan for hiring such staff.

Well, I'd advocate a dog more than a cat, but to each her own :lol:

Seriously, if I died tomorrow, I would be content with the legacy I've left behind because I know I have made at least a small contribution to some people's lives. I don't need to leave a genetic legacy. I have considered adopting an older child when I'm more settled, but I just don't feel that need to pop out a baby from my own body.

 

[LindzyRae]

Re: RE: To have children or not?

indeed tracy,

if you want someone to love you, get a cat.
if you want leave a legacy, build something memorable.
if you want someone to care for you in old age, plan for hiring such staff.

Done (x2, plus 2 rats and a few fish)
Working on it
:laughing6: sure, once I win the 649

I agree compleatly, a child should be brought into this world only when it has mature and responsible parent/s. I was an "accident" and even though I know my mother has always loved me I also know that she was not ready to be a parent. And if it wern't for the help of the rest of my family she never would have been able to afford it.