Soul Mates

Dexter Sinister

Unspecified Specialist
Oct 1, 2004
10,168
539
113
Regina, SK
And I'm 38 years with the same lady, ever since we were 16 years old.
Impressive statistic, good for both of you, sounds like you (and karrie) got it right the first time and got what I've always thought was the ideal wish for such things: may your first love be your last. Wish I'd been able to do that, I'd be carrying a lot less emotional baggage.

I'm 28 years with the same lady, and my debt to her I rejoice to acknowledge, but I didn't get it right the first time. The lady I loved when I was 16, my first love, I still think about and sigh over sometimes, for what might have been. I saw her and spoke to her last summer, first time in many decades that our paths crossed. Damn, she was as beautiful as she always was to my eye... And I don't think she had any idea of the effect that had on me. I really loved her once, with everything I had, I thought she was the one, and for 4 years she was, until somehow she slipped away on me. She had a very controlling (and, not coincidentally, alcoholic, a late casualty of WW2) father, and when she came into her maturity she threw away large parts of her past, quite justifiably, but unfortunately I was part of what she threw away. At least that's how I eventually came to understand it. Sometimes I wonder if she's ever regretted that... but thinking about that too much is a route to madness.
 

karrie

OogedyBoogedy
Jan 6, 2007
27,780
285
83
bliss
Dexter... part of what frustrates me about the notion of soul mates is that it's a way of thinking that would try to ignore and erase your history with your first love. "Oh, wasn't mean to be, find the REAL love."

Well, just because it didn't work out doesn't mean that it wasn't intense, real love. Life just doesn't work out for the maintenance of a relationship sometimes.

Having had a friend widowed at the age of 30 is part of what drove the point home to me. If you go buying into the notion of soul mates, then do you say that her husband was the wrong one? You'd need to pick between one of your husbands (as I'm assuming she will eventually remarry) as to which was the real 'soul mate'. Sounds tacky to me.

But I guess it also depends on definitions, etc.
 

Artryru

Nominee Member
Jan 27, 2009
60
0
6
I hope there is such a thing as soul mates 'cause then I could my match-making landlord off my back. My own intuition is a best guild for me and not some old lady I bearly know try and set me up with a complete stranger. I'd rather let my sister take care of the blind dates, thank you.