That's what we used to tell our daughters. Nowadays, people want to play, don't want to pay and justify it when they avoid the cost.
Crumbling Foundations: Why the Family Unit Is Crucial to Civilization
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That's what we used to tell our daughters. Nowadays, people want to play, don't want to pay and justify it when they avoid the cost.
Very good point Hermann! I remember my husbands parents were as you described. They were in what obviously was a loveless marriage where I really don't think either knew the other. I believe it was more habit that kept them going than love or understanding.
Well, I've been married for more than two decades now and I can say absolutely that this marriage has no religious basis. What it does have is two people who realised right off that it is composed of two individuals who sacrificed some individuality for the sake of the union. My wife and I are parts of an entity, like the right and left arms, legs, or ears of the same body.
We are both atheists, but I would suggest that our marriage is so strong that nothing but death could manage to dent it.
Perhaps some people should be more religious than they are; it might save a few marriages. But, I would suggest that it isn't a lack of moral (I dislike that word) fiber and knowledge of principles that people ail from, it's a lack of willpower to follow their existing principles.
We are both atheists, but I would suggest that our marriage is so strong that nothing but death could manage to dent it.
Perhaps some people should be more religious than they are; it might save a few marriages. But, I would suggest that it isn't a lack of moral (I dislike that word) fiber and knowledge of principles that people ail from, it's a lack of willpower to follow their existing principles.
Good points. That is the perfect ideal of a marriage. I think what happens nowadays is young people do not enter marriage with this sort of understanding. They are too busy being individuals to care about the union.
I think that's an overgeneralization. Some do...not all do.
I think the point I would like to make is that families can come in all shapes, sizes, philosophies, this that and the other thing. I don't think maintaining the "traditional" family as defined by some is necessary. Keeping love, support, etc in family situation, however, is, without much argument, important.
It's an online discussion forum and a generalized conversation, so we can assume generalizations are the norm. That being the case, there does not seem to be the same committment to a stable relationship amongst many people today as there was in my parents time. There certainly is a need for the traditional family, now more so than ever. People lack roots, they lack ties and bonds. This is given by the traditional family unit.
lmao
Well, thanks, but I hardly think our marriage is perfect. For instance, on a few things our timings are completely different.
I think the past few generations are like that. Not just the kids these days.
Just curious, and it is none of my business, but were you married in a Church?
I am not trying to be faceteous, I just am curious.
But congratulations to the both of you on your ability to sustain a marriage for such a span of time!
I said overgeneralization....if someone makes an absolute statement that blankets all in one group unfairly, it should be jumped upon...so, I did.
I don't think the issue is "traditional family" in the sense of 2 heterosexual parents and 2.2 kids, a dog and a white picket fence IS necessary at all. Love, respect, support, unselfishness, realism...THESE things are important. But they can effectively be delivered by one parent, or by two parents of either hetero or homosexual relations, by legal guardians, but a group of dedicated folks combined to provide a communal family atmosphere, etc. The idea that the "traditional" family, as defined most often is not necessary.
With the exception of the homosexuals, who i do not believe should be allowed to adopt children, I agree with the essence of your post. however, the traditional family should still be the goal, the standard we aspire to.
I think a mother and father, is the best situation for children.
And, that should be the goal for all families.. I don't think single woman should be going to sperm banks to have kid they choose to raise alone. Thats wrong.
But I have no problem with whatever loving person who adopts a child.
A homosexual couple or anyone that loves a child and will care for them, should be allowed to adopt. Thats where we disagree canadarocks.
And, that should be the goal for all families.. I don't think single woman should be going to sperm banks to have kid they choose to raise alone. Thats wrong.
But I have no problem with whatever loving person who adopts a child.
A homosexual couple or anyone that loves a child and will care for them, should be allowed to adopt. Thats where we disagree canadarocks.
Soooo...why do you feel that homosexual couples should not be able to adopt? I would love to hear your explanation of this one.
^^right on.
canadarocks, you'd rather see a kid in group homes and foster homes, then being with a loving homosexual couple?
BTW, this has no religious bearing.
canadarocks, you'd rather see a kid in group homes and foster homes, then being with a loving homosexual couple?
BTW, this has no religious bearing.
Actually, yes. That's why my wife was more into getting married than I. She's not atheist, but somewhat deistic. I wasn't quite atheistic at the time and she was Protestant.
Thanks for the congrats.
Maintaining it is a lotta work sometimes but well worth the effort.
We have become very selfish ,having weddings for the party ,paying people to get pregnant for us ,parts of the world having babies born with life threating illness and disease ,many by rape ,because they refuse birth control ?--wht is right and what isn't, its unclear (will two lesbians be better parents than one addicted mother ??,its important to care for your immediate family first --once you have children and wife or husband you need to give and take in harmony not because someone said so --because you want to --as a unit
Hollywood doesn't help us -
-Homosexual ism has been around for a long long time --hidden
Hollywood doesn't help us -
-Homosexual ism has been around for a long long time --hidden
Actually, yes. That's why my wife was more into getting married than I. She's not atheist, but somewhat deistic. I wasn't quite atheistic at the time and she was Protestant.
Thanks for the congrats.
There is such a stability that comes from a long relationship, a familiarity that is comforting. Funny, I was talking to a young couple the other day regarding their upcoming wedding in June and the bride to be commented that she hoped her marriage was a long one, "at least over five years". I couldn't help but think of how much this was a reflection of our times when 5 years would be thought of as a long marriage. Contrast that to my parents who had been married for 49 years at the time of my Mother's death, or my grandparents who had been married for 63 years.
Honestly ,thinking about" how long your marriage will be "-- putting a number on it --what next bets on ebay (don't take that to the bank lol )
Why on earth would someone be thinking about time --what about --oh ,never mind --We are in worse shape than previously hoped
Shame seems to work well ,Thats what held many a marriage together, the shame of divorce on the family --either we've become shame less or selfish --or both --how did this happen --oh ,the breakdown of the family unit
Why on earth would someone be thinking about time --what about --oh ,never mind --We are in worse shape than previously hoped
Shame seems to work well ,Thats what held many a marriage together, the shame of divorce on the family --either we've become shame less or selfish --or both --how did this happen --oh ,the breakdown of the family unit
Shame, or a sense of responsibility? I think what has happened in recent history is many people are too self-centred. In other words, they seek only what makes the SELF happy, with no real thought to the effects this might have on other people. If there is no abuse, I see nothing wrong with staying in a marriage out of a sense of duty and obligation to the family and the children. We are too quick these days to seek only those things which please our own selves.
So we look for a quick self satisfying fulfillment --well ,cant really be fulfillment ,so if we looked at divorce , the effects it would have on the unit, the children, their future and each parent future emotional ,monetary needs --it makes no sense so, co habiting would work and may even strengthen the marriage because each has time to explore thier self ,their likes dislikes ,is this why living together for a period of time(prior to marrage ) seems to make people realize there are as compatible as first thought ?
Maybe, but that is not at all what I was suggesting. Let me put it another way, I believe a marriage should stay together no matter what and under all circumstances, unless there is abuse of some kind going on. I think the last thing that is important in a marriage is the individual.