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The remains of a young Roman girl have been found by archaeologists in Witherley, Leicestershire. They prised open the child's coffin for the first time in 1,700 years and found two jet bracelets in there with her, desbribing the find as "unusual". The child is as yet unnamed, but...

British scientists accidentally killed the world's oldest-known creature. Poor old Ming the mollusc saw off Queen Elizabeth I, the English Civil War, the Enlightenment, the Industrial Revolution and two World Wars - but suddenly came a cropper when the climate scientists got their mitts on...

A mountain in Scotland is six inches shorter than previously thought, meaning it is no longer classified as a Munro Top. In Scotland, Munros and Munro Tops are mountains which are over 3,000ft. Knight's Peak on the Isle of Skye had been listed as 3,0002ft. However, surveyors using GPS...

Europe's Goce satellite has been seen burning up through the atmosphere by some Falkland Islanders. The European Space Agency's (Esa) Goce satellite - which has been dubbed "the Ferrari of space" due to its sleek looks - was the first European satellite to make an uncontrolled re-entry into...

Plans for a new six-runway airport that could be built within seven years have been released. The proposed airport would sit on an artificial island off the Isle of Sheppy in Kent in the Thames Estuary. But the £47.3 billion airport - dubbed "Boris Island" after London Mayor Boris Johnson...

You'll have to try hard to find a more beautiful, more feel-good story than this one. When Harold Jellicoe Percival died last month aged 99, he had no family or close friends to attend his funeral except a handful of care home staff. It seemed as if there would be nobody to mourn the WWII...

The wreck of a mysterious boat has been seen for the first time after fierce winds shifted the sand it was buried in. The wreck is situated just off a beach in the shadow of the mighty Bamburgh Castle in the far north of England and it first appeared in June. Since then a team of...

A group of riders dressed in red have created the world's largest poppy for Remembrance Sunday. About 15,000 bikers travelled along the M25, which is Europe's busiest road and which circles London. The road is 117 miles in circumference. The event raised £2,300 for the Royal British Legion...

Go back and see who it was who started talking about phallic symbols. I was talking about food.

In the space of an hour we've managed to drift from jellied eels to phallic cymbals. People are gonna love reading this thread.

Any "fascination" I have with "phallic-shaped foods" is completely coincidental.

Are you for real? Seriously? A Stonner is a deep-fried kebab. You were the one who then brought phalluses into the whole equation.

Just who was it who brought up phalluses? It certainly wasn't me. I was enjoying talking about deep-fried Mars bars. If you are that interested in them check out the Phallic Cymbals blog which is dedicated to the weird, wonderful, and worrying things we do with our wieners. OMG, it's a...

Yeah. Definitely devoid of any sense of humour. Phallic cymbals

You're the weird one. So completely devoid of a sense of humour you wouldn't know one if it came up to you and bit you in the ****. Jesus.

So what's a phallic cymbal then?

Oh. I see.

Symbol? Isn't that part of a drum kit?

What's a phallus, then? Is it something you wear?

I would eat eel over deep-fried Mars bar. Mussels are nice, too.