Dad, would you, could you?

[feronia]

Thank you Sassylassie.

BitWhys you have every right to your truth. You have every right to bring up your child(ren) as you see fit. CDNBear's
story touched me because in my opinion his actions were quite heroic. He put himself in a place of Truth. He could have lied. He could have sugarcoated it. He didn't. He put it all on the line and showed exemplary character.

 

[Curiosity]

I loved this topic - it is what I would like to see more of.....

People levelling and telling us things which are unusual and difficult in their lives and sorting it out with people - even strangers who will listen and comment and give encouragement.

I am sorry Bit that you felt the need to soil the thread. But you are getting lots of attention and if that is what you lack in real life - ask for it - and you shall receive. On another thread.

 

[CDNBear]

Thanx for the back up guys, but we should let him have his word. As I have recently jumped on someone for stifling others facts and views, I can not justify stifling Bit. Yes his comments were unjustified, he is sceptical, but he has that right.

I will take it all in stide. The annonimity I am afforded, makes it just as easy to thrust a knife as it does to let me wear my heart on my sleave. I openned the door, and good or bad, I will face what comes through it.

To Bit, I'm sorry you feel that way, but thanx for comin' out.

 

[BitWhys]

I loved this topic - it is what I would like to see more of.....

People levelling and telling us things which are unusual and difficult in their lives and sorting it out with people - even strangers who will listen and comment and give encouragement.

I am sorry Bit that you felt the need to soil the thread. But you are getting lots of attention and if that is what you lack in real life - ask for it - and you shall receive. On another thread.

this thread was soiled the moment Sargeant Fury started looking for sympathy over being trapped by a phoney moral imperitave based on false pretenses.

its a public forum. cry me river.

makes a cute recruitment story though.

 

[feronia]

I usually don't get angry over idiots (not naming names because its a bannable offense to attack another member), I usually just remember , men with small members are usually bullies. Then I take a deep breath and and remember to take nothing personally. Its really quite comforting to have morals.

 

[CDNBear]

this thread was soiled the moment Sargeant Fury started looking for sympathy over being trapped by a phoney moral imperitave based on false pretenses.

its a public forum. cry me river.

makes a cute recruitment story though.

So I take it, you dislike soldiers?

There is a reason I posted this in the philosophy section, as much as it was difficult to do, I wasn't sure if it was the right moral, philosophical or parental thing to do.

Sorry my dilema, seems to have placed your knickers in a tight bunch. I can assure you, I was not looking for sympathy, merely input, from intellegent folk. I'm not sure you fall into that category. But it was nice hearing from, just the same.

 

[BitWhys]

What I dislike is a demonstrated lack of understanding as to where the remorse should lie. There's no dilema involved in what you had to tell your kid. The truth, obviously. That's a parent's job. When you manage to explain to him your decision in the field would be the result of unavoidable human shortcoming he'll know you're not missing a piece of the puzzle. That'll probably make you feel better.

 

[CDNBear]

What I dislike is a demonstrated lack of understanding as to where the remorse should lie. There's no dilema involved in what you had to tell your kid. The truth, obviously. That's a parent's job. When you manage to explain to him your decision in the field would be the result of unavoidable human shortcoming he'll know you're not missing a piece of the puzzle. That'll probably make you feel better.

That was excellent! Why could you not say that in the beginning? Whether or not, what someone has to say is palletable or not, is not an issue with me. But being sacastic, isn't really contributing. Thanx for the real reply.

 

[BitWhys]

That was excellent! Why could you not say that in the beginning? Whether or not, what someone has to say is palletable or not, is not an issue with me. But being sacastic, isn't really contributing. Thanx for the real reply.

spot a new guy with a nasty tattoo in the pool hall who looks like he might stick around for a while, make sure he knows you know how to pull chain.

besides, some dishes are best taken piecemeal.

thanks for serving, btw.

 

[CDNBear]

spot a new guy with a nasty tattoo in the pool hall who looks like he might stick around for a while, make sure he knows you know how to pull chain.

besides, some dishes are best taken piecemeal.

thanks for serving, btw.

I get that, I tend to be the clown in the lampshade, or skirt, depends on whether I won the bet or not.

 

[BitWhys]

I get that, I tend to be the clown in the lampshade, or skirt, depends on whether I won the bet or not.

LOL!

 

[Curiosity]

Awwwwwwwwwright!!! Resoluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuution !!!

 

[feronia]

At the risk of sounding feminist I have only one word. Men.

 

[Curiosity]

Feronia

HA! Men - lovable divils they are and quite potty!

 

[elevennevele]

My son, who just so happens to be left leaning(LOL), asked me the hardest question he has ever asked, I found it easier to discuss sex ed. with him then this, "Dad, would you have killed the kid?", "Could you have killed the kid?"

That is a tough question. Neither answer is right, and neither answer is wrong. A very moving situation to share with people here.

There is the idea that a son goes in search of his father to find the hero of himself. It is a concept in many cultures if not all, and such searches yield a coming of age and a process towards becoming a man. Obviously this is one of those situations where it would seem your son searched for something of his dad, and aside from your relationship with him, this is a way for him to learn how to define himself in the world. It does show however that your son is giving a lot of thought in defining himself. That in itself is something to take great pride in as a father.

Your son will probably weigh for himself as to whether he views your answer as a strength or as a weakness of who you are, but I’m sure he’ll love you no less for it. Father/son bonds can be hard to break once already formed. If you showed him that the question was very painful for you, then you’ve lost no respect either.