Naughty Bits

peapod

Hall of Fame Member
Jun 26, 2004
10,745
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36
pumpkin pie bungalow
I'm bi-sexual btw.. though atm the moment, in a long term relationship with a lady Swedish at that, med student at Concordia

So if you decide to bend in one direction in the future, will she perform the operation at cost?

I remember the male strippers of my youth...reminds of a story...oh oh not another one of those! It was usually run by tricksters, they lure you in with free booze, and good company other women! When the prime rib has been served they let all the hamburger in to try and get you between the bun sorta speak. The trick is to drink all there booze before ten and have a car waiting and running when the hamburger rolls in.

Her Story.
Once I attended the creme de la creme of a male strip show, I am taking sizzle and not the steak house kind either. The show was late and well to be frank I was like a pig at a trough with the free booze. I seem to remember a cowboy up on the stage dancing away..I liked his badge and his guns! I knew my little neice harbored a great desire to own such a collection....everything went black than................
Next morning...wake up! my neice is jumping up and down on my bed wearing a badge and firing off guns! what the hell I say? she says thanks aunt peapod you make all my dreams come true....little neice please pass aunty the phone she must contact the aliens she was with last night to make sure there is not a warrant out for her arrest. Everything turned out well....neice was happy, no warrant out for peapod. Although I did hear the cowboy was not so happy about me hog tieing him and taking his wares! Now don't be thinking anything bad when you read the word wares!
 

Diamond Sun

Council Member
Jun 11, 2004
1,366
1
38
Within arms reach of the new baby..
I think that threads like this are either replied to by people who are comfortable, or skipped over by those who are not. There's nothing offensive about talking about sex. People just have different levels of comfort when doing it.

The first things I learned about sex were in school from my friends. I never once had a "talk" with either of my parents. The closest I got was "Be careful, I'm not ready to be a grandpa" when I was 18.

It's a natural activity and I hope I'm doing it for a long time yet! Besides, I have a very talented, very salacious, very experimental, very attentive Xendrick.
 

peapod

Hall of Fame Member
Jun 26, 2004
10,745
0
36
pumpkin pie bungalow
American Voice said: Has Pandora's Box been opened here?

I could relate an anecdote from a Sunday afternoon long ago, about warm, swollen skin in a particular place, cognac applied, evaporative cooling, and warm lips, but I'm reluctant to do it.

Not to worry american voice, we canadians appreciate an american twist on things. The funny thing is that is exactly and I mean exactly what happened to my sister.

When I was much younger than I am now, our entire family gathered round the dining room table one night. It was a big night if you and your family are lumberjacks, it does not take much to entertain us. Anyway on with it.

We gathered round the table, my mother light the kerosene lamp, and then we saw her, sitting in the middle of the dining room table was my sister. Young, blonde a sweet little girl. But there was one faux pas. Right on top of her red lips, swollen they were to, most likely from infection. Was this huge, big old yellow BOIL. This thing was huge! It had to be the size of a demi tasse saucer. My mother opened the bottle of cheap chinese wine she stored in the cupboard. We were poor lumberjacks so cognac was unavailable to us. But disinfection can be done by either. The suspense built up, but finally an emplosion or explosion which ever you prefer rocked our little log house to its timbers. My sister recovered even tho my mama used one of those big darning needles on her.

Don't worry about opening pandora's box or anybody's box for that matter. There is always somebody around to slam the lid down. Don't forget to move your finger out of the way...of the box lid I mean.
 

Andem

dev
Mar 24, 2002
5,645
129
63
Larnaka
I have absolutely no problem talking about sex. It doesn't feel weird talking about it, and it's not really a turn on talking about it unless you're talking about it with someone on your lap!


LuShes... where are you?!
 

Andem

dev
Mar 24, 2002
5,645
129
63
Larnaka
Numure said:
Anyways... I head to Female strippers for a few beers and alot of entertainement. So much fun! Small lap dance, always exciting ;) Male strippers, always fun to make the gals jealous and kiss the dancers. Most of the dancers are gay, I only know 1 that isnt (I know em all, at the local Males Strippers bar on the south shore).

Come on, Numure! You know over 70% of them downtown ARE straight... or atleast claim to be. Let's see, Taboo, Westside, Stock? By the way, on my last birthday, I was brought out to these strip clubs and given private dances... OVERRATED!

I was at Westside, and the stripper who came upto me and said "Your friend bought you a private dance". So in this little booth he's telling me his life story while dancing on me. "Blah Blah Blah, girls girls girls, I'm straight". Then he's putting MY hand on him.

Total turn off, the whole lot!

I have not been to any in the South Shore though.. and no, any kind of strippers don't turn me on, they are there for fun. Like I said, last time I went, I was dragged out on my birthday when I lived in Montreal.
 

Haggis McBagpipe

Walks on Forum Water
Jun 11, 2004
5,085
7
38
Victoria, B.C.
Black boy-style briefs here.

Tsk, all these years, men had it figured out, cute but comfy briefs. They kept it a secret, too, and women were left out of the loop.
 

Numure

Council Member
Apr 30, 2004
1,063
0
36
Montréal, Québec
Andem said:
Numure said:
Anyways... I head to Female strippers for a few beers and alot of entertainement. So much fun! Small lap dance, always exciting ;) Male strippers, always fun to make the gals jealous and kiss the dancers. Most of the dancers are gay, I only know 1 that isnt (I know em all, at the local Males Strippers bar on the south shore).

Come on, Numure! You know over 70% of them downtown ARE straight... or atleast claim to be. Let's see, Taboo, Westside, Stock? By the way, on my last birthday, I was brought out to these strip clubs and given private dances... OVERRATED!

I was at Westside, and the stripper who came upto me and said "Your friend bought you a private dance". So in this little booth he's telling me his life story while dancing on me. "Blah Blah Blah, girls girls girls, I'm straight". Then he's putting MY hand on him.

Total turn off, the whole lot!

I have not been to any in the South Shore though.. and no, any kind of strippers don't turn me on, they are there for fun. Like I said, last time I went, I was dragged out on my birthday when I lived in Montreal.

As I said, I went on the South Shore. Le 281 ;)
 

Haggis McBagpipe

Walks on Forum Water
Jun 11, 2004
5,085
7
38
Victoria, B.C.
All this talk of goats... to paraphrase a oldie but goodie:

Two goat herders are flying the herd to a new farm. Suddenly, the engine fails and the plane begins to hurtle towards the ground...

GH1: Quick! Grab a parachute and jump!

GH2: What about the goats?!?

GH1: Fuck the goats!!!!

GH2: (long pause) ... err, do you think we have time?