-The line seemed to stretch back forever. Hundreds of millions of souls,
waiting patiently for their turn before the throne. The date... Well, the
day is Judgment Day, so you won't find it on any calendar. The queue of
people winds its way down the mountain, through the valley and off into
the far distance. Everybody in the queue can see the final destination at
the mountain peak. A hundred miles away, they can see it perfectly
clearly. And they wait, moving forward a couple of steps at a time.
Towards God, and the Decision.
At the head of the we find a young Christian, wearing an expression of awe
and joy. Behind him, an atheist, looking slightly astonished, examining a
leaf she has picked from a nearby bush, trying to decide if it is real or
not. Heaven, she thinks, should be whiter, with more dry ice swirling
about; not look like a Welsh hillside on a hot day.
The Christian steps forward for judgment.
"Hello Martin". God's voice is calm and gentle as He speaks.
"Erm.. Hello. Lord". Martin's voice is nervous, as a dozen emotions fight
for room in his mind at once.
"This is it. This is where I decide what shall happen to you, Martin. In
life, you were a Christian". It was a statement, not a question.
"I was, Lord. I still am. I have been all my life. I have dedicated myself
to your service."
"Tell me, Martin. Why were you a Christian? Why did you believe in me?"
"Why? Well... Because you are God! I've always believed in you."
"That is not what I want to know. Why did you believe?"
"Because I knew it was true. You were always there for me. You helped me
through the bad times. You answered my prayers. You gave me the strength
and courage to get through life. I could feel your presence with me all
the time."
"No."
"Pardon, Lord?"
"I said no, Martin. I have never helped you. You seemed to be doing
perfectly alright by yourself. I heard your prayers, but never answered a
single one. Your belief in me definitely helped you on occasion, but I
have never intervened in your life. Certainly, you gave me credit for all
the good times, but they were your own doing, not mine. You did not feel
my presence, because it cannot be felt. The only actual proof you have
that I exist at all is here and now. Again, tell me why you believed."
"I.. I had faith, Lord. Since I was a child I have been to church, prayed
and sang every Sunday. My faith in you never wavered. Even when my mother
died, I had faith that it was your will, that it was a blessing from you
that she passed peacefully. I was raised to believe in you, and as I grew
I read the Bible for myself, and learnt of your miracles, and all the
saints and martyrs, and the good done in your name. I read the works of
great philosophers and they merely strengthened my faith. I knew it was
true. "
"No, Martin. Your mother died of natural causes, and she died peacefully
because of the actions of the hospital. I watched and saw, but that is
all. As for the rest - the saints, martyrs and philosophers had similar
reasons for their belief in me, just as dictators and murderers have had.
People have done great good and great harm in my name, and in the names of
a thousand false gods. The Bible was written about me, not by me, and was
written by people who had similar reasons as you for their belief, just as
a thousand other Holy Books have been written about the false gods, or
different versions of myself. I ask for the third and final time. Why did
you believe in me?"
Martin looked shocked and ashen, but pulled himself together. His Lord was
testing him, and he had lived his entire life for this moment.
"I believed because I could feel in my heart it was true. You sent your
son to die for us, and I gladly accepted Him as my saviour. I.. I just
knew it was true, and now that I see you, my faith has been vindicated. I
no longer need to believe - I can see for myself the truth and majesty of
my religion."
Quietly, God spoke again. "Martin, you have impressed me". He paused.
"But... not enough. You believe because you were taught to believe. You
believe because you mistakenly attribute to me anything positive that has
happened in your life, and discount anything negative. You believe because
it is comforting to believe, and because you are frightened of the
consequences of my not existing. You believe because... you believe. I'm
sorry, Martin, but there is no place for you here."
God gestured briefly with his fingers, and Martin vanished. His shadow
lingered where he had stood, fading rapidly to nothingness.
The atheist, somewhat shaken by what she had just seen, stepped forward.
"Hello Eve. I like that name."
"Ah. Hello, God. Thanks", said Eve, not entirely sure how to address a
being she had, until now, considered fictional.
"Yes, you may call me God. Eve, in life you were an atheist. You doubted
my existence, even objecting to the very concept". Again, a statement, not
a question.
"Yes, I did. Clearly, I was mistaken."
"Clearly. Tell me, are you still an atheist?"
"I suppose not. I'm not a Christian, Jew or anything else. I guess I'd
have to be called an involuntary theist. Ah ha ha", Eve laughed nervously,
hoping the very real and solid-looking deity before her had a good sense
of humour.
"Mmm... Tell me, Eve. Why did you not believe in me?". God's voice was
kind and gentle once more.
"At one point I did. I was raised as a Christian, and often went to
church, and prayed every night before bed. When I was feeling down I would
read the Bible. The act of reading it seemed to comfort me, even though
the words themselves didn't seem much help. I think, like Martin, I
believed because I believed."
"And then you lost your faith? You decided I did not exist, and you knew
better than those around you? You knew better than your pastor and
family?" The voice was losing its kindly edge a little.
"That is one way of looking at it, yes. What I believed did not seem to
fit with other things I knew. The Bible clearly could not be literally
true, word for word. I knew from biology and paleontology that humans had
evolved like all other life, and were not special creations. How life or
the universe began, I still don't know, but could not just merely accept
'God did it' as an explanation. I learned about other religions, and how
they all claimed a monopoly on truth, happiness and morality. I saw the
good done in your name, but I also saw the oppression, genocide and wars.
I saw that if people were in need, it was up to us to deal with it, not to
rely on heavenly aid.". Eve felt a little braver, but was expecting the
traditional thunderbolt any moment. The people behind her, now at the head
of the queue, were slowly moving backwards, trying not to draw attention
to themselves.
"Yet here you are, before your God, on the final Day of Judgment. Why
should I allow you in - a heretic, a disbeliever, an infidel - when your
predecessor, devout and faithful, full of love for me, was consigned to
Oblivion? Tell me why. Justify your entry to my Paradise."
Eve straightened up, looking God in the face. "Why should you let me in?
Because I am better person than you."
If Eve had looked round, she would have seen the entire line of souls,
perfectly still and wide-eyed, staring at her in shock.
"What did you say?", enquired God. His voice, though barely audible,
caused tremors in the mountain.
Surprised at still being alive, her mouth dry, Eve continued. "I said,
because I am a better person. You have shown it yourself already. You told
Martin that you watched as his mother became ill and died. You destroyed
him for believing for no good reason, when his whole life had been shaped
by that belief. Your preachers on Earth encourage unquestioning faith, yet
you do not tell us whether that is what you want. You give people no
rational basis for belief, and then when they make up their own that is
not good enough for you. You listen to our prayers, yet do not answer,
leaving people to rationalise events for themselves. People kill and
slaughter over trivial differences in doctrine, and you look on. In the
churches and temples raised in your glory, children are mentally and
physically abused - in your so-called House! All over the world,
throughout history, people have murdered each other for believing the
wrong thing about God, for believing in the wrong God, or for not
believing in any God. The poorest and most helpless people are
relentlessly targeted, being told to give what little they have now, for
the promise of eternal bliss later. When a person is at his lowest ebb,
that is when the smiling missionaries appear, knowing that his life will
probably get better naturally and they can give you the credit. In your
name, the ends justify the means as long as souls are saved". Eve paused
for breath, and continued.
"And you? All-powerful, all-loving, all-knowing? You just sit here and you
watch it all... Any person in this line, had they your power, would show
greater compassion and morality. You may be God, but you are far from
Godliness."
God smiled. "Are you finished? Good. Eve, you have impressed me". He
paused. Eve held her breath, shoulders tensing.
"You have impressed me a great deal. You may have believed in me for all
the wrong reasons, but you disbelieved for the right reasons. You led a
good life, and used the intelligence I give to everybody in the correct
way. Even though you came to a conclusion about me that was hopelessly
wrong, you came to it in a way that cannot be faulted. You may pass into
paradise, Eve, with my blessing."
Eve did not step forward. Instead, she spoke once more. "No, I will not".
"No? You refuse Heaven? You defy my will?" The smile had left God's face
again.
"Do you think I would want to spend one more minute, let alone eternity,
in your company? You allow people to suffer, sometimes for their entire
lives, for no purpose, and then judge them on their reaction. You hide
yourself from the world and allow your creations to persecute each other
over differing interpretations of the lack of evidence. You see all the
pain and ignorance caused in your name, and just sit there as this queue
grows daily? And then you have the audacity to punish good people for
believing in you 'for the wrong reasons'?"
"Eve. Enough of this. The gates to Paradise are open to you. Be silent
now, and enter."
"No. If it is a choice between oblivion and an eternity with a monster
like you, I gladly choose oblivion. I ask only one thing, before you
destroy me."
"And what is that?" asked God, getting impatient.
"That, if you can, you look me in the eyes as you do it."
Shortly afterwards, the next person in the queue stepped towards the top
of the mountain, and Judgment.