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The British are the tops, Guv-nah Josh Kjenner (American) The other day, I decided that maybe my teeth could use a little less uniformity and a lot more serration. After replacing my toothpaste with syrup, my toothbrush with a ball of icing, and my floss with a skillsaw blade, I then...

Football (or soccer as it's called in North America) is THE most popular team sport in the world. Nearly every country has its own national team, including Iraq whose team recently played Qatar in the final of the football tournament at the Asian Games. The Iraqis won the silver medal Saddam's...

Thanks to the Industrial Revolution which started in Britain in the late 18th century, Britain's cities during the 19th century were probably the dirtiest - and smelliest - in the world. Thanks to the dirty water that people drank, outbreaks of cholera and typhus were common. Industrial...

Christophe Deborsu, a news reporter, delivers the fake bulletin as Flemish Belgians wave Flanders (Northern Belgium) flags(Alexis Haulot/Reporters) The Times December 15, 2006 Thousands of Belgians were thrown into a panic by news that the Flemish half of the country had declared...

Rule Britannia: A new portrait of the Royal Family commemorating the commissioning of Prince Harry into the British Army by artist Sergei Pavlenko © PA It's a common occurence for the Queen to attend the passing out parade at the Royal Military Academy at Sandhurst to inspect the new...

VIDEO: The boss who fell asleep on a railway track 15th December 2006 Kevin Craswell can be seen asleep to the left of a passing train and using the live rail as a pillow Go here to watch the video as a train passes by the sleeping man -...

Aldermaston, in Berkshire, is a gigantic factory - with around 1,100 buildings - where Britain designs, tests and builds its nuclear bombs. And the biggest construction project in Britain is underway as this huge place is getting bigger. And, like America's Area 51, the base is highly Top Secret...

In 1807, thanks to the work of MP William Wilberforce, Britain became the first country in the world to abolish the slave trade and, thanks to the Royal Navy, managed to capture the slave ships of other nations - such as Denmark, the United States and France - and force them to cease the trade...

Two British soldiers won't let a small matter like having one leg prevent them from continuing to fight for their country.... . Courage ... Aveuta and Andy rejoin unit in Cyprus EXCLUSIVE Army pals are fighting fit From TOM NEWTON DUNN Defence Editor, in Cyprus December 13 2006 TWO...

Police ars shocked at the rate of the killings. The Yorkshire Ripper in the late 1970s killed five prostitutes in the space of six weeks (he went on to kill 13 women in total) whereas the current serial killer has killed at least five prostitutes in the space of six DAYS. He even surpasses the...

Inns appeared in England in the twelfth and thirteenth centuries, and were apparently fairly common, especially in towns, by the fifteenth century. The earliest buildings still standing today, such as New Inn, Gloucester, or King's Head, Aylesbury, date from this time. While inns provided...

A killer dubbed the Suffolk Ripper - whose killings resemble those of Jack the Ripper and the Yorkshire Ripper (late Seventies / early Eighties) - has killed at least five prostitutes in the Ipswich area. Jack the Ripper - the world's first modern serial killer - killed five prostitutes in the...

Aliens 'are frozen in ocean' Terrifying ... space expert believes Mars life-forms could wipe out civilisation on Earth By PAUL SUTHERLAND Sun Spaceman December 12, 2006 KILLER Aliens are lying frozen beneath the surface of Mars, says a top UK space scientist — and he wants to...

Louise ... Paris invite EXCLUSIVE I've got a frog in my throat By VIRGINIA WHEELER December 12, 2006 CONFUSED Louise Clarke convinced herself she was FRENCH after she developed one of the world’s rarest disorders. The 30-year-old recruitment consultant babbled away in the...

Stranger than fiction: books whose titles range from weird to hilarious 11th December 2006 Tens of thousands of books are published every year. Some become bestsellers, while others are unintentionally funny or just plain weird. A new collection of book covers celebrates the hundreds...

People - especially the British - have always suspected that French males are a bit soft and maybe, deep down, all homosexual. And Stade Francais - the Paris rugby union team - have proved us right. The picture above shows some Stade Francais players celebrating after beating Manchester team...

We all know that the French like to take to the streets and protest or go on strike and blockade the British/French border (the Channel Tunnel) with their lorries stopping innocent Brits from getting into that godforsaken land, but marching against the year 2007 and the death of Sartre is taking...

Blitzed by text messages By TOM NEWTON-DUNN December 11, 2006 Cunning: Attacks against British soldiers in Afghanistan are DOWN since the British started playing mind games with the Taliban TALIBAN fighters in Afghanistan are being bombarded by a devastating new British...

Turksy should be allowed to join the EU. The Times December 11, 2006 Straight Road to Europe Turkey does not deserve the punishment the EU contemplates For 43 years, Turkey has been knocking at the European Union’s door. Despite being the guardian of Nato’s southern flank...

Oh no! It's Vicky Pollard's mother of Dibley 11th December 2006 No ifs or buts, it takes an outsize character to put Vicky Pollard in the shade. But Dawn French manages it with ease. The erstwhile Vicar of Dibley takes to tracksuit and trainers as she plays Vicky’s mother Shelley in...