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You die deader if you're killed by a migrant criminal than if you're gunned down by a teenager with a patriotic AR-15. That's the problem.

So. . . likely the most powerful country in the history of the world will bossed by the guy who's lost it, or the guy who never had it. Great.

The Extreme Court heard arguments last week. Should know soon.

And that, buckeroo, if proven, is straight-out religious discrimination.

Well, y'know, when Jesus was mayor of Nazareth, his administration took a lot of heat.

Hardly "recent." Wait. . . I take that back. Maybe up yonder you've always been all gentlemanly up until last week. Certainly not down here.

The version I've heard is that beating Drake's drum will cause his fleet to rise from the bottom to defend England. We won't comment on how well a 16th-century sailing vessel would fare against even the lightest of 21st-century warships. I like the legends, though.

Tracy Chapman's "Fast Car."

Good idea. That way you'll never, ever have to hear anything that opposes, or even casts question upon, Da Troof!

Article It's OK. I'm sure Trump'll pardon 'em.

I guess the Big Five'll have a new crop of players next year. Or this year.

Feel ya, bro. I give Canada full marks for trying, but legislating or regulating feelings is a sure loser.

Water captain is way better.

Do cats recognize them? So why didn't he become one? Being a pig-ignorant drover ain't exactly hard. Most of 'em I've ever known wore baseball caps. Usually gimme caps. Water captain or dirt captain?

Maybe for Tokyo, but I believe the statutory bar on debts incurred by getting nuked is the half-life of uranium-235 or plutonium-238.

Sorry, the "we" in this case is the United States. We gave 'em a bunch of re-building work in Tokyo, Hiroshima, and Nagasaki.

Not on purpose, anyhow.

When you don't understand what you're talking about, probably best not to.

I wish. That's an actual thing. The conspiracy theory, that is.

Sources are compromised.