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Witless and Kushy ain't going. Turns out they had a five-year-old's birthday party to attend.

It's certainly what the Kay-beckers and the Albertans want. And given how much you hate half the people in Canaduh, I'm surprised you're not right in there pitching with 'em.

Jerry Lee Patel

Elbridge Gerry was a Boston politician who first "creatively" drew district maps to favor his party in 1813. Elkanah Tisdale, a local artist, drew Gerry's unusual district as a dragon, called a "salamander" in those days. The rest is history.

"It's like being savaged by a dead sheep." --Dennis Healy

Is there anybody you don't hate and fear?

At least until he gets a shot at them.

Who, exactly is the would-be dictator? Is it still True Dope, or is it Carney now? Or some other shady, nefarious figure?

Or yellow submarines.

And it will be four o'clock on a Tuesday afternoon. . . FOREVER! MWAAA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA! Mine is an evil laugh!

The science is fine. We now know much more about coked-up salmon. WHY we want to know about coked-up salmon remains a question. Hmmm. . . maybe I could get a grant to study that?

Not if they're government contractors.

Can't make an empire without breaking a few eggs. And a lot of people.

Story But his REAL skill is writing up research grant proposals.

Have you tried genocide?

36 hours. That's three days. . . or so I'm assured. Metric system, I guess.

Wait, what? Is sailing only a 12-hours-per-day oparation? Wouldn't increasing Vancouver's port's capability be a good thing?

Fond du Lac, I'd say. Winnipeg is so far south a stiff breeze'd blow it into the States.

You'd rather give it to them as straight-up welfare?

Yeah, you also say "aboot."