If you've gotta be old as dirt, here's the way to do it

Haggis McBagpipe

Walks on Forum Water
Jun 11, 2004
5,085
7
38
Victoria, B.C.
ELDERLY WOMAN GRABS BURGLAR WHERE IT HURTS AND DOESN’T LET GO

A 93-year-old Lithuanian woman got a burglar's undivided attention this week when she grabbed him by the testicles and squeezed as hard as she could.

Published reports say the encounter began when two robbers forced their way into the woman's home. She fought back and grabbed the testicles of the burglar closest to her. The woman told police, quote, "He started screaming like an animal and his friend was trying to pull him free, but I have a grip like iron."

The man's screams alerted neighbors and police quickly arrived on the scene and arrested both burglars. A police spokesman said the man could hardly walk and seemed pleased to see the cops. He told police he was in a lot of pain and demanded to be taken to a hospital. The woman told police she developed a strong grip from years of milking goats.
 

no1important

Time Out
Jan 9, 2003
4,125
0
36
56
Vancouver
members.shaw.ca
Good for her.
The burgler got what he deserved. Maybe he will rethink his career choice.
 

Haggis McBagpipe

Walks on Forum Water
Jun 11, 2004
5,085
7
38
Victoria, B.C.
She's definitely a good role model for growing old. Her attitude is probably the main reason why she has lived so long!

Wouldn't put it past the burglar to sue her. Hell, I wouldn't even put it past half the judges out there to rule in his favour, and that is a sad thing.