Do you talk too much

VanIsle

Always thinking
Nov 12, 2008
7,046
43
48
This is a problem that has plagued me over the past 10 - 15 years. I used to be shy and never said much of anything. Then one day someone said to me "you talk so much" and I felt so hurt. For a number of years I felt two things about those words. First I thought she was obnoxious for saying them right to my face and more than that - I was embarrassed. Later on, another person said it to me. Then about a month ago, my own brother kind of made an apology to my cousin regarding my talking. My cousin hasn't been around me for years and since we had lots of catching up to do - I guess she hadn't noticed. I would not have known about his comment but she voiced it out loud right in front of him because she didn't agree. Maybe by the time she left here, she did agree. I have no idea. I did notice that her own husband has the same problem so maybe she's just used to it. It's even been pointed out to me on here. Not with the words "you talk too much". Words like "how about a break in paragraphs, or how about less words" and I know what that person is trying to tell me. Again I get embarrassed.
I looked it up on google. It appears that many people have the same problem. I am an extremely anxious person and another brother of mine says that he notices that the more anxious I become, the more I talk. Do you - or have you had this difficulty and what did you do about it. My only saving grace is that I don't talk to the customers oddly enough.8O:-(
 

lone wolf

Grossly Underrated
Nov 25, 2006
32,493
210
63
In the bush near Sudbury
As long as it means "you have the gift of gab" and not "you're a blabbermouth", I wouldn't worry too much about it - as long as you'll let someone else get a word or two in edgewise....
 

Kreskin

Doctor of Thinkology
Feb 23, 2006
21,155
149
63
I love people who talk a lot, if it can be a two-way street. Being spoken to ad nauseam isn't a conversation. If the "talker" can stop long enough to allow a conversation then it's great. If not I turn them off.
 

Cannuck

Time Out
Feb 2, 2006
30,245
99
48
Alberta
I'm not a big talker so sometimes it's nice to be with somebody that will carry the conversation by themselves. There is a difference between talking a lot and babbling. Repeating the same things over and over again just because one can't be still, is a little annoying. So I guess it isn't so much how much one talks but what they talk about. I think it was Shaw who said "Her trouble is she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech"
 

JLM

Hall of Fame Member
Nov 27, 2008
75,301
547
113
Vernon, B.C.
This is a problem that has plagued me over the past 10 - 15 years. I used to be shy and never said much of anything. Then one day someone said to me "you talk so much" and I felt so hurt. For a number of years I felt two things about those words. First I thought she was obnoxious for saying them right to my face and more than that - I was embarrassed. Later on, another person said it to me. Then about a month ago, my own brother kind of made an apology to my cousin regarding my talking. My cousin hasn't been around me for years and since we had lots of catching up to do - I guess she hadn't noticed. I would not have known about his comment but she voiced it out loud right in front of him because she didn't agree. Maybe by the time she left here, she did agree. I have no idea. I did notice that her own husband has the same problem so maybe she's just used to it. It's even been pointed out to me on here. Not with the words "you talk too much". Words like "how about a break in paragraphs, or how about less words" and I know what that person is trying to tell me. Again I get embarrassed.
I looked it up on google. It appears that many people have the same problem. I am an extremely anxious person and another brother of mine says that he notices that the more anxious I become, the more I talk. Do you - or have you had this difficulty and what did you do about it. My only saving grace is that I don't talk to the customers oddly enough.8O:-(

Don't worry about it VanIsle, most of us love you. I figured out a long time ago, that you are quite a sensitive person, with a fairly thin skin- but hey that's the way you are- I'm a little the same. I know what "hurt feelings" feel like. The main thing is that once you are sure you are right stick to your convictions BUT always welcome new information that may make you change your position. For 30 or 40 years I didn't change my opinion too much, now I find I'm changing it as often as my socks. Hopefully that is a sign of graduating from intelligent to wise.
 

VanIsle

Always thinking
Nov 12, 2008
7,046
43
48
Thank you to all. I actually wasn't seeking compliments or criticizm. I was truly asking the question and truly wondering if anyone else has the problem. On a personal level, I don't really know if I am just babbling or not. My son says that what I have to say is interesting but I have a tendency to go into too much detail. It sounds like not too many people are willing to admit they could be talkers or maybe we don't all recognize ourselves. I didn't.
 

lone wolf

Grossly Underrated
Nov 25, 2006
32,493
210
63
In the bush near Sudbury
Me dear, departed grand mom insisted I didn't just kiss the Blarney stone, I was inoculated with a gramophone needle. If I wasn't a talker, I could never be a writer....
 

JLM

Hall of Fame Member
Nov 27, 2008
75,301
547
113
Vernon, B.C.
Thank you to all. I actually wasn't seeking compliments or criticizm. I was truly asking the question and truly wondering if anyone else has the problem. On a personal level, I don't really know if I am just babbling or not. My son says that what I have to say is interesting but I have a tendency to go into too much detail. It sounds like not too many people are willing to admit they could be talkers or maybe we don't all recognize ourselves. I didn't.

Talking is important, listening is more important.
 

rufus

Electoral Member
Mar 7, 2009
934
14
18
My boyfriend loves to talk and what he says is always very interesting and informative. He has done a lot with his life and has lived in many different countries during the course of his career.
I, on the other hand, am a very quiet person. I usually only say something when I feel it is important enough to say it.
We get along famously. I can sit and listen to him talk for hours and I don't have to say very much. I love to sit and listen to people who are intelligent and have something to say. People who have the courage of their convictions, know what they want and how to get it.

Don't ever feel embarrassed because you have an opinion and a voice to express it.
 

Chev

Electoral Member
Feb 10, 2009
374
2
18
Alberta
I don't usually talk very much. I would rather listen to what other people have to say. What really irks me is when there's something really bothering me and I want to talk to someone about it, they somehow turn the conversation back around to them and their interests/problems etc. I have one 'friend' who does that to me regularly. VanIsle, we love you just the way you are, and as I said, I would rather read what you write. If it was ever in person, I'd rather listen to you.
 

JLM

Hall of Fame Member
Nov 27, 2008
75,301
547
113
Vernon, B.C.
I am a shy introvert who has a hard time expressing my views.

I wish I had the gift of the gab.

Maybe one day

Now you've got me to thinking............ I knew I had a problem and now that you've mentioned it, I'm sure that's my problem. :lol::lol: