Bah Humbug!!

canuckleheadlover
#1
Anyone else only get a cold when they can't afford to? Tonight is an important Xmas party. I'm meeting family friends of my husband (not to mention his first love) and instead of being completely prepared and stunning...i have and itchy, red, peeling nose with puffy watery eyes. Why oh why me? ok, just wanted to vent. I'm here feeling miserable and I KNOW Diamond Sun is having an enjoyable weekend away. Oh well i see her in less than a week. until then, BAH HUMBUG!
 
Reverend Blair
#2
I have the cure, Canuckleheadlover. Go to the medicine cabinet and take one of everything in there. Now go to liquor cabinet and do the same.

Okay, you aren't actually cured but you are at the point where it doesn't really matter to you anymore.

If you want to shake a cold in a hurry, eat vitamin C until your pee changes colour. Take a beer mug, put two fingers (my fingers...people with small hands might want to use three fingers) of rum in the bottom, add 1 pouch of Neo Citran, 2 tablespoons of honey, top with boiling water, and cinnamon to taste. Drink it...it's yummy.

Go to sleep for four or five hours (the drink you just had will help with that). You will wake up refreshed and happy, if slightly discombobulated. Vitamin B and caffeine will fix the discombobulation though.
 
edgerunner
#3
If you want to have a highly evolved immune system so thhat you never get sick, do what the Rev just suggested plus add 2 teaspoons of Cayenne powderr,, 2 caps of powdered ggoldenseal Root and some odorless garlic(Kwai brand) and slurp that all down once or twice a day for your entire life. Wash your hands often and there you go.
 
Reverend Blair
#4
MMMMMMMMM....cayenne.
 
Twila
#5
I think you should do just as Rev and Edgerunner suggested.

Then when you get to the party make sure you cough discreetly in the hand you plan to use to shake hands with your husbands ex girlfriend.

Quote:

will wake up refreshed and happy, if slightly discombobulated. Vitamin B and caffeine will fix the discombobulation though.

Discombobulation relief? People pay good money to feel discombobulated! It's feeling combobulated you have to worry about.
 
missile
#6
I sugggest no cures until after the party. They'll all be sick and you will be well . And,be sure to plant a big wet one on the ex's cheek!
 
Paranoid Dot Calm
#7
 
peapod
#8
"Discombobulation relief? People pay good money to feel discombobulated! It's feeling combobulated you have to worry about". ok twila, who the hell are you??? you are just to funny
 

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