booze fest

peapod
#1
Where the heck is everybody? Where is the hag? How about a favorite drinking story about yourself or somebody else? Come on people help me out here! I hope to see some posts here by the time I return from starbucks for evening lattie and jest with other jesters! Here is a story about somebody else! Honest I am not green.

FLAGSTAFF, AZ- Famous wrestler Andre The Giant's binge drinking was legendary. Upon initiating a typical night of drinking, Andre would need to consume two full bottles of vodka just to get a small buzz.

Incredibly, Andre's almost inhuman tolerance has been surpassed by the beast known as The Hulk, who has recently taken to drinking to pass the time instead of throwing rocks and getting shot with exploding mortars.

After a lengthy battle with arch-nemesis The Leader, Hulk stumbled into The Electric Banana Bar, mumbling, "Hulk sick and tired, Hulk ready to crawl in bottle," and promptly began drinking. After 5 kegs worth of beer and several cases of Tequiza, which The Hulk reportedly enjoyed more than a can of beans, The Hulk leapt out of the bar, leaving a huge hole in the ceiling. Witnesses reported that the irate emerald monster was shouting, "Hulk not even cocked! HULK WANT TO GET PISSED!"

The Hulk continued in vain to drink his troubles away, destroying three bars and a TGI Friday's in the process. A patron who sat next to the Hulk during his bender at the Derrydale Inn remarked, "The guy had three bottles of Everclear one after the other, and I couldn't even smell alcohol on his breath. He seemed pretty pissed about it. I don't know what he's complaining about; he left without having to pay for anything."

Finally, after consuming roughly 375 gallons of alcohol (and urinating enough liquid to fill a large outdoor pool), the Hulk gave up. Reportedly, he angrily leapt back to the desert, grumbling complaints of "Hulk still walking fine and finding ugly women ugly!"

The following day, at a party at Rick Jones' house in California, The Hulk had a Mike's Hard Lemonade, and oddly, just half-way though the drink, he became completely drunk.

"It was the funniest thing I've ever seen," Jones told FTW. "I've seen this guy drink rubbing alcohol like it's Juicy Juice. Half a Mike's laid him out! He was hitting on She Hulk, he was so wasted! Oh man, good times."

The Hulk has already lined up a contract to plug Hard Lemonade in television and radio commercials, in exchange for a lifetime supply of the beverage. The spots will air during MTV's Undressed and Batman Beyond starting in November.
 
galianomama
#2
is this the guy that's green?

no wonder.
 
peapod
#3
Hello my friend! one armed peapod here. No kill bill moves today.
 

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