COLUMNIST
Thu, March 25, 2004
Metric mess
By MICHAEL PLATT -- Calgary Sun
It's one thing wanting to sit on the fence, but not knowing how to measure the wood to build one?
Now that's sad.
And very Canadian.
If you're like most folks living in this country, you're a casualty of the longest-lingering gaff in federal government history -- one that continues to plague every Canadian who ever wanted to bake a cake, build a fence or read a European Playboy.
It's called the metric system. It was meant to make the simple act of measurement even less confusing, and bring Canadians in line with cutting-edge 20th century thinking.
With the 21st century well under way, the average Canadian no longer understands their own driver's licence.
Not only are we not metric, we're not imperial either.
We're sort of both, depending on what you want measured. And we're almost always confused.
Ottawa abandoned mandatory metric in 1983, fearing it restricted freedom of choice -- but the myopic magoos didn't drop metric as Canada's official system, leaving the half-converted country in measurement limbo.
As a nation permanently stuck between systems of measurement, once-basic tasks are reduced to guesswork, or with the right formula, a conversion requiring a calculator.
The stalled switch-over to metric has made every aspect of Canadian life a muddle of mismatched measures.
Most of us understand metric temperature, unless it comes to body temperature, in which case a fever is still anything over 98.6F -- maybe 39C doesn't sound like day-off-work sick.
Distance is now a kilometre thing, as is speed -- unless you're measuring a Jarome Iginla slapshot or the top-speed of a sports car, in which case it's back to MPH. And though we buy fuel in litres, our cars get good or bad mileage, in MPG.
To calculate most lengths and areas, we revert to imperial.
Our homes, measured in square feet, are built on metric lots, with fences up to six feet tall, and both are constructed from wood described in inches -- like a 2X4 or 2X6.
If someone hops over that fence and breaks into our home, police issue a suspect description in feet-and-inches, and pounds. If that same crook also turns out to be a drug dealer, his contraband is measured in kilos, ounces and grams.
People and their parts -- with the exception of European Playboy bunnies -- are always described in imperial terms.
The confusion starts the minute a Canadian is born -- when was the last time you heard a proud parent announcing their 3,750 gram bundle of joy?
Liquids are among the most unruly measurements of all, with pints and ounces the standard for alcohol, and litres for milk, pop and juice.
In the kitchen, a hodgepodge of millilitres, ounces, quarts, as well as pounds, grams and kilograms, can make a cook weep faster than diced onions.
The comedy of incompatibility just never ends.
Worse, there seems little hope of the situation changing, at least until Canada elects a government with enough leadership to finish what was started, or to scrap metric completely.
Children are still taught metric in schools, but ask a young person how tall they are, or how much they weigh, and you'll see the same pattern emerging.
Imperial is being passed on to new generations -- not enough to give them thorough understanding, but too much to let metric rule.
The result is a system so cluttered we'd almost be better off going back to the days when people used their hands and feet to measure things -- at least then there might be some consistency.
Instead, because politicians decided to meddle in the lives of Canadians but lacked the leadership to finish the job, the country will remain in measurement limbo indefinitely.
Thirty-four years after Canada started going metric, the job is still only half-finished.
Whether it's centimetre-by-centimetre, or inch-by-inch, it's time this country started moving towards one system, and one system only.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Email: michael.platt@calgarysun.com
Letters to the editor should be sent to: callet@calgarysun.com
Home Page
Thu, March 25, 2004
Metric mess
By MICHAEL PLATT -- Calgary Sun
It's one thing wanting to sit on the fence, but not knowing how to measure the wood to build one?
Now that's sad.
And very Canadian.
If you're like most folks living in this country, you're a casualty of the longest-lingering gaff in federal government history -- one that continues to plague every Canadian who ever wanted to bake a cake, build a fence or read a European Playboy.
It's called the metric system. It was meant to make the simple act of measurement even less confusing, and bring Canadians in line with cutting-edge 20th century thinking.
With the 21st century well under way, the average Canadian no longer understands their own driver's licence.
Not only are we not metric, we're not imperial either.
We're sort of both, depending on what you want measured. And we're almost always confused.
Ottawa abandoned mandatory metric in 1983, fearing it restricted freedom of choice -- but the myopic magoos didn't drop metric as Canada's official system, leaving the half-converted country in measurement limbo.
As a nation permanently stuck between systems of measurement, once-basic tasks are reduced to guesswork, or with the right formula, a conversion requiring a calculator.
The stalled switch-over to metric has made every aspect of Canadian life a muddle of mismatched measures.
Most of us understand metric temperature, unless it comes to body temperature, in which case a fever is still anything over 98.6F -- maybe 39C doesn't sound like day-off-work sick.
Distance is now a kilometre thing, as is speed -- unless you're measuring a Jarome Iginla slapshot or the top-speed of a sports car, in which case it's back to MPH. And though we buy fuel in litres, our cars get good or bad mileage, in MPG.
To calculate most lengths and areas, we revert to imperial.
Our homes, measured in square feet, are built on metric lots, with fences up to six feet tall, and both are constructed from wood described in inches -- like a 2X4 or 2X6.
If someone hops over that fence and breaks into our home, police issue a suspect description in feet-and-inches, and pounds. If that same crook also turns out to be a drug dealer, his contraband is measured in kilos, ounces and grams.
People and their parts -- with the exception of European Playboy bunnies -- are always described in imperial terms.
The confusion starts the minute a Canadian is born -- when was the last time you heard a proud parent announcing their 3,750 gram bundle of joy?
Liquids are among the most unruly measurements of all, with pints and ounces the standard for alcohol, and litres for milk, pop and juice.
In the kitchen, a hodgepodge of millilitres, ounces, quarts, as well as pounds, grams and kilograms, can make a cook weep faster than diced onions.
The comedy of incompatibility just never ends.
Worse, there seems little hope of the situation changing, at least until Canada elects a government with enough leadership to finish what was started, or to scrap metric completely.
Children are still taught metric in schools, but ask a young person how tall they are, or how much they weigh, and you'll see the same pattern emerging.
Imperial is being passed on to new generations -- not enough to give them thorough understanding, but too much to let metric rule.
The result is a system so cluttered we'd almost be better off going back to the days when people used their hands and feet to measure things -- at least then there might be some consistency.
Instead, because politicians decided to meddle in the lives of Canadians but lacked the leadership to finish the job, the country will remain in measurement limbo indefinitely.
Thirty-four years after Canada started going metric, the job is still only half-finished.
Whether it's centimetre-by-centimetre, or inch-by-inch, it's time this country started moving towards one system, and one system only.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Email: michael.platt@calgarysun.com
Letters to the editor should be sent to: callet@calgarysun.com
Home Page