Roast Goose with Port Gravy


1 (12 pound) fresh goose
3 onions (Since the New Democrats have been crying for years this is a given)
2 stalks celery
4 slices French bread (Bloc will enjoy this)
2 carrots
1 cup boiling water
1 cup dry white wine (Each politician will require different amounts)
1/4 cup tawny port wine (Liberals might want the red wine)
1/3 cup all-purpose flour
3 cups chicken broth(Conservatives will like this)
salt to taste
ground black pepper to taste


Discard loose fat from goose. Remove neck, cut into large pieces, and reserve. Rinse goose inside and out, and pat dry. Pierce skin of goose all over, and season with salt and pepper. (Cabinet ministers can identify with this on)

Loosely pack neck cavity with enough bread to fill out cavity. Fold neck skin under body, and fasten with a small skewer. Quarter 1 onion and all the celery, and place inside the body cavity of the goose. (Politicians you got to stuff it deep)

Tie legs together loosely with kitchen string, or insert legs through slit in lower skin flap. ( Just like when the voters legs were tied by having an election )

Reduce temperature to 325 degrees F (165 degrees C). Carefully pour boiling water over goose; juices may splatter. Continue roasting goose, skimming off fat and basting with pan juices using a metal bulb baster every 20 minutes. Cook for 2 to 2 1/2 hours more, or until a meat thermometer inserted in fleshy part of thigh registers 175 degrees F (80 degrees C). When done, the juices should run clear when thigh is pierced with a skewer (This one deals with the committees)

Transfer goose to a heated platter. Remove skewer and discard string. Keep goose warm, loosely covered with foil, until ready to serve.

With a slotted spoon discard vegetables, neck pieces, and giblets from pan. Spoon off fat from pan juices, and reserve. On top of stove, deglaze pan with white wine and port over moderately high heat; scrape up brown bits. (Those same brown bits you give to the reporters at scrums)
Add chicken broth, and boil mixture until reduced by about half. In a 3-quart heavy saucepan, whisk together 1/4 cup reserved fat and flour; cook roux over moderately low heat, whisking to prevent lumps. Whisk chicken broth mixture into the roux. Bring gravy to a boil, whisking constantly.( Now Senators the gravy train is very hot) Turn down heat. Simmer gravy, whisking frequently, for 5 minutes or until thickened. Season gravy with salt and pepper. Transfer gravy to a heated sauce boat

To all our politicians Merry Christmas and enjoy your goose