A great solution for Middle East crisis
Borrowed from here:
STOP KILLING US.
That’s all; just stop killing us. Jew, American, decadent Western porn merchant, infidels anywhere and everywhere — just stop killing us. If you do that, we can stop worrying about defending ourselves — the only truly effective means of which seems to be killing you — and all those resources that you and your oppressive theo-kleptocracies currently devote to killing us can be put to better use. Like, say, buying more black fabric with which to swaddle those blank, subjugated women you’re all so threatened by.
Stop lobbing missiles at Israel from the territory they’ve ceded you, and using the civilian populations of those areas (if any) as objects to cower behind. Perhaps you could turn instead to trying to develop one — just one — prosperously functioning economy in your hellish corner of the world.
Stop sending freakazoid hate-fueled hypocrites to every corner of the world to sit in our titty bars lapping up our fine liquors and undertipping, until the cognitive dissonance gets to be too much for them and they simply can’t resist blowing something — along with themselves — up. Just stop it.
Stop insisting that the punishment for infidel dogs all over the world failing to conform to your diseased and hateful religious rules be death at your hands. Just let it go, stay in your own desert warrens or tacky, juiceless cities, and leave us the **** alone.
Sell us the oil our vigorous economies demand at market prices, and use the profits to continue the crucial work of flailing your population of howling savages into resentful submission. Or, alternatively, refuse to sell us the oil, and eat the stuff for all we care. Rest assured that we’ll find other sources eventually; we’ll find the stones to respond to the absurd demands of our resident enviro-nut leeches with the appropriate scorn and restart the drilling when our situation becomes dire enough to demand it. Meanwhile, stay out of our hair, and stop inflicting your humiliating societal failure and the resultant slavering psychosis on the rest of us.
If you’ll just agree to do that, we’ll be perfectly content to sit back and let you kill as many of each other as your innate cruelty and illogic demands. We’ll watch quietly as your economies grind to a halt, your governments falter, your bitter religion turns inward and destroys itself, and your “civilization” withers and eventually fades away unlamented. But stop killing us.
Otherwise, the bombing will continue until morale (yours) disappears entirely. Thank you so much for your cooperation.
Great ideas and so simple too...it'll never happen though.