Why People's Opinions of You Aren't Real

Cliffy

Standing Member
Nov 19, 2008
44,850
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Nakusp, BC

Besides that, what people think they know about you can only be seen through the filters of their own self image. Every time they pass judgment on you. they are passing judgment on themselves. It is really important to step away from other people's judgments and find out who you really are and to become your own authentic self.
 

Twila

Nanah Potato
Mar 26, 2003
14,698
73
48

Besides that, what people think they know about you can only be seen through the filters of their own self image. Every time they pass judgment on you. they are passing judgment on themselves. It is really important to step away from other people's judgments and find out who you really are and to become your own authentic self.

my dad use to say (this was way before the time of computers and such) that you are less likely to enjoy the company of people that are most like you. that you the things your focus on that you don't like are mirrored in your habits, tendencies, etc. Basically those you argued most with were more likely to be just like you.

I always felt there was something to that. Not that your forced to disagree with them, you can use it to your advantage if you're open minded.
 

Cliffy

Standing Member
Nov 19, 2008
44,850
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Nakusp, BC
Yeah whoever that might be.
It is not an easy process and it never ends. We are programmed from birth into the matrix of our society. We are told to live up to everybody's expectations. Most people really have no clue who their authentic self is but there have been many who have tried to show us the way, and there are many ways. First step would be to not give a sh!t what other people think of you. Then spent time in the solitude of nature and pay attention to your own thoughts.

I spent years listening to my thoughts and what I discovered was that most of them had someone else's voice attached to them: parents, siblings, teachers, students, priests or minister... most of them degrading, insulting or self denigrating. Then it is another process of changing that inner dialogue. They say you cannot love another until you learn to love yourself, warts and all. Once you can do that, then that is what you offer to the world. We live in an insane world, full of violence, judgment and petty minds. If figure the purpose of being here is to be content with ourselves in spite of all that insanity. Peace out, man! :) ;-)
 

SLM

The Velvet Hammer
Mar 5, 2011
29,151
3
36
London, Ontario

Besides that, what people think they know about you can only be seen through the filters of their own self image. Every time they pass judgment on you. they are passing judgment on themselves. It is really important to step away from other people's judgments and find out who you really are and to become your own authentic self.

LOL. So every time you label forum members as "sheeple" what you're really doing is projecting your own mindless beliefs onto others?

Or does this whole "really just passing judgement on themselves" thing only apply to other people?
 

EagleSmack

Hall of Fame Member
Feb 16, 2005
44,168
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48
USA
LOL. So every time you label forum members as "sheeple" what you're really doing is projecting your own mindless beliefs onto others?

Or does this whole "really just passing judgement on themselves" thing only apply to other people?

Cliffy.... you just got...

 

Cliffy

Standing Member
Nov 19, 2008
44,850
192
63
Nakusp, BC
LOL. So every time you label forum members as "sheeple" what you're really doing is projecting your own mindless beliefs onto others?

Or does this whole "really just passing judgement on themselves" thing only apply to other people?
Of course not. The more I am on here, the more I learn about myself. That is the point and, like I said, it is a never ending process. If one day we reach true enlightenment, we would no longer need to be here - Poof! Gone. To be human is to be falible.
 

Ludlow

Hall of Fame Member
Jun 7, 2014
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wherever i sit down my ars
I think we can say all day long that we don't care what people think of us. But that;s just a defense mechanism . Deep down I think most of us do. Doesn't mean you have to kiss peoples butt to gain their acceptance. Probably more like you have to put this hard shell on so you can appear to be invincible. People need people regardless of how much they insinuate that they don't.
 

Cliffy

Standing Member
Nov 19, 2008
44,850
192
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Nakusp, BC
I think we can say all day long that we don't care what people think of us. But that;s just a defense mechanism . Deep down I think most of us do. Doesn't mean you have to kiss peoples butt to gain their acceptance. Probably more like you have to put this hard shell on so you can appear to be invincible. People need people regardless of how much they insinuate that they don't.
I think eventually we have to become open and vulnerable. We need people in our lives because they teach us about ourselves. I never understood the guru types who lock themselves away in a cave to gain enlightenment. To me that is just avoidance. People are our mirrors.
When I fist came to BC from Montreal. I wanted to get as far away from those crazies as I could. I planned to buy a horse and ride off into the sunset. But one day I realized that I was one of the crazies I was running from and it soon became clear to me that if I did that, I would become even crazier with only myself to talk to.
So I didn't get that horse but I did stay on the fringes for quite a while. I discovered that you cannot experience how to be fully human, to experience ecstasy without pain, love without hate, joy without depression. We live in a reality of duality. We need the negative to really enjoy the positive.
 

darkbeaver

the universe is electric
Jan 26, 2006
41,035
201
63
RR1 Distopia 666 Discordia
I think eventually we have to become open and vulnerable. We need people in our lives because they teach us about ourselves. I never understood the guru types who lock themselves away in a cave to gain enlightenment. To me that is just avoidance. People are our mirrors.
When I fist came to BC from Montreal. I wanted to get as far away from those crazies as I could. I planned to buy a horse and ride off into the sunset. But one day I realized that I was one of the crazies I was running from and it soon became clear to me that if I did that, I would become even crazier with only myself to talk to.
So I didn't get that horse but I did stay on the fringes for quite a while. I discovered that you cannot experience how to be fully human, to experience ecstasy without pain, love without hate, joy without depression. We live in a reality of duality. We need the negative to really enjoy the positive.

Sweet confusion ain;t it nice

aviod the sharp edges go with the flow everything will be ok

I'm not Serious I'm mars.
 

MHz

Time Out
Mar 16, 2007
41,030
43
48
Red Deer AB
I would hate to find that I have been entertaining 'bots only' at this place. Would that be a case of 'botulism'??
 

AnnaG

Hall of Fame Member
Jul 5, 2009
17,507
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"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." Teddy Geisel (Dr. Seuss)

hehe I figure can call people "sheeple" because I have been one, so of course I view them through my filter. lol
 

MHz

Time Out
Mar 16, 2007
41,030
43
48
Red Deer AB
The leader of my tribe has this motto.

Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do,
do it with thy might;
for there is no work,
nor device,
nor knowledge,
nor wisdom,
in the grave,
whither thou goest.
 

Cliffy

Standing Member
Nov 19, 2008
44,850
192
63
Nakusp, BC
Sweet confusion ain;t it nice

aviod the sharp edges go with the flow everything will be ok

I'm not Serious I'm mars.
I've been to the abyss and back on several occasions. According to doctors, I should not be here. But here I am, much to chagrin of the usual suspects.
 

AnnaG

Hall of Fame Member
Jul 5, 2009
17,507
117
63
I think we can say all day long that we don't care what people think of us. But that;s just a defense mechanism . Deep down I think most of us do. Doesn't mean you have to kiss peoples butt to gain their acceptance. Probably more like you have to put this hard shell on so you can appear to be invincible. People need people regardless of how much they insinuate that they don't.
hehe I care about what the people I care about think about me. :D
 

Ludlow

Hall of Fame Member
Jun 7, 2014
13,588
0
36
wherever i sit down my ars
I think eventually we have to become open and vulnerable. We need people in our lives because they teach us about ourselves. I never understood the guru types who lock themselves away in a cave to gain enlightenment. To me that is just avoidance. People are our mirrors.
When I fist came to BC from Montreal. I wanted to get as far away from those crazies as I could. I planned to buy a horse and ride off into the sunset. But one day I realized that I was one of the crazies I was running from and it soon became clear to me that if I did that, I would become even crazier with only myself to talk to.
So I didn't get that horse but I did stay on the fringes for quite a while. I discovered that you cannot experience how to be fully human, to experience ecstasy without pain, love without hate, joy without depression. We live in a reality of duality. We need the negative to really enjoy the positive.
For what it's worth, " the deeper sorrow cuts into your being, the more joy it can contain "-Khalil Gibran.