The remains of the day

My husband is the middle kid of three brothers, and he has done lots of grumbling over the years.
Oldest was given more respect, and helped along toward his future, with lots of thought and
pride, and youngest was always spared from having to do too much, cause "he's too young and
can't do it", my husband, was a worker, always, youngest one was lazy, so youngest one had to
be helped to complete chores, (much resentment), oldest one was talked about too much,
big expectations for him, and when they were older, oldest and youngest fought, as they were
similar, so yes, as you said, the middle guy was the referee, but he also got his licks in by
goading one against the other at times.
An Italian family, with lots to say, loud discussions, which I always thought was argueing, but
they said, "we are only talking", so how did I ever get mixed up with such a family, as I was
from English/Irish, very conservative and quiet, and proper, BUT their family was functional and
mine wasn't, so I bought into that in a big way.
Talloola you reminded me of a friend I had when I was younger - the family used to play poker on Friday nights - like it was some kind of family ritual. I used to go over not to play but to watch them all fight haha
Mom was a red headed Irish woman with a temper. Dad was a volatile Italian - the kids were a combination of both. It was wonderful and made my own family seem so boring I even asked my parents why none of us ever yelled and have a good time getting mad....which they thought was awful.... they almost stopped me going !
None of them ever said they were mad but the hands flying and finger pointing and jumping up from the table to walk around - amazed me - like some real play which they were all involved in. Amazing to have such a family. I felt something was missing in mine.
Well Curiosity, now that all of those italian folks have passed on, (immigrants), and the ones who
are offspring carry on , they are not the same. As much as I needed that warmth and functionality of
a family, I could only be in the middle of the 'shouting muddle' for short periods of time, as I am
much more comfortable in quiet surroundings, but, when away from them for awhile, I do desire
a visit, and we will not see those people ever again, in that environment, they are/were the true
Italians, mixing in their 'own' way, and as they die, it is 'gone', we really notice that now, and
often talk of the 'old times', as now that we are older, we realize how special and valuable
that relationship was.
Quote: Originally Posted by CuriosityView Post

Hi Karrie

I had time this morning to go rummaging around for an old submission I had has to do with middle children as the author writes she is one... thought you would see some things in there you would enjoy reading.
I have her permission to use any or all of her essays as I wish.

A very neat essay Curio, thanks!

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