Durka, I have a problem. I slept with this woman. I think it was a woman. Anyways, she did some really nasty stuff, and though she had a really lucid tongue and it was great fun, I have begun experiencing various rashes and itching all over my body. I don't want to broach the subject with her, because it is very personal to all involved. Anyways, long story short, tell Mrs. Durka I said hi.
Mr.Snowles, Mrs. Durka says hi. She advised me the rash is only the begining of your problems. According to her, she slept with a Turkish man at a Truck Stop, contracting your disease. Now, speaking purely as a guide, I suggest you rub lime on your nether regions, within 5 days you will feel better or your goods will fall off.
This thread is for asking Mr.Durka for advice on all of lifes trials and tribulations. Mr.Durka has studied side by side with the Jo-Jo Psychic Alliance. Please feel free to address your fictional problem and situations to me. If you are not satisfied with my answers, you can consult my middle finger.