Crematoriums order bigger furnaces as waistlines grow


sanctus
#1



By STEVE DOUGHTY The spread of obesity is causing a problem for funeral directors and crematorium managers, it has been disclosed. Their clients are now often so large that their coffins will not fit into the furnaces, town hall chiefs said.
 
tamarin
#2
Why not see this as what it is - a big plus! We don't need bigger ovens to toast grand-dad or auntie. We need individuals trained to reshape and refit bodies so that existing offerings work. This could be a new career path. One taught at community colleges across the land. Let's get on it.
 
sanctus
#3
Quote: Originally Posted by tamarinView Post

Why not see this as what it is - a big plus! We don't need bigger ovens to toast grand-dad or auntie. We need individuals trained to reshape and refit bodies so that existing offerings work. This could be a new career path. One taught at community colleges across the land. Let's get on it.

This is a gross thought, but here goes, it would probably be cheaper to cut the bodies up to fit as opposed to buying new equipment
 
eh1eh
#4
Quote: Originally Posted by sanctusView Post

This is a gross thought, but here goes, it would probably be cheaper to cut the bodies up to fit as opposed to buying new equipment

But that wouldn't stimulate the economy as well.
 
L Gilbert
#5
Freeze dry em first.
 
Tonington
#6
Or hire guys like Satrioli Waste disposal, those union guys know how to ummm work with these kinds of problems
 
sanctus
#7
Quote: Originally Posted by ToningtonView Post

Or hire guys like Satrioli Waste disposal, those union guys know how to ummm work with these kinds of problems

There you go!
 
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