For the left handed....

Twila

Nanah Potato
Mar 26, 2003
14,698
73
48
RE: For the left handed..

Can I be enigmatic?

Y'all have kewl names
 

Wetcoast40

Electoral Member
Feb 21, 2005
159
0
16
Lesser Vancouver
RE: For the left handed..

There it is again. I'm alternately sinster, gauche, more intelligent, likely to go insane, clumsy, a bit dim, more creative, a victim of prejudice, more ambidexterous, etc., etc., etc....
Worse than that, according to Dr. Stanley Coren's research in 'The Left-Hander Syndrome', the number of males living past the age of 80 is less than 1%. I'm being persecuted by the Invisible Pathologist!
 

Twila

Nanah Potato
Mar 26, 2003
14,698
73
48
RE: For the left handed..

We should maybe apply to be considered a visible minority.
 

peapod

Hall of Fame Member
Jun 26, 2004
10,745
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pumpkin pie bungalow
Just in.....hot off the teletype....

Left handers could be left with no shop! 8O

Soho’s world-famous Left-handed Shop in groovy Beak Street, has announced it will be closing down next month. The tragic event has been blamed on a recent decision by the shop’s manager Ben "Lefty" Winkle to employ only left-handed members of staff.

Since 1985 the store had been a haven for the troubled and sometimes sad members of our society with dominant left hands, providing left-handed can-openers, scissors, tennis rackets, cutlery and Bibles to name just five or six. Now however, these items - which are essential in making left-handers feel as though they belong in normal society - are no longer available and sit uselessly in a warehouse in Wandsworth.

Things started to go wrong in June when Mr Winkle became sick and tired of the constant bickering between his right and left-handed sales assistants about who was better and what was 'normal'.

His controversial sack

His controversial move to sack the right-handers rocked the special-needs retail world and even cropped up in the House Of Commons when Lionel Blair got cross and swore. It all blew over though when Mr Winkle offered the right-handers money to leave quietly - which they did, clutching a reputed £50.00 each in their good right hands.

With a full team of Lefties, the shop started experiencing problems almost immediately.

Huge queues of disgruntled and angrified customers formed as the disadvantaged staff fumbled and mucked up simple till transactions due to their disability. On some days, the shop didn’t even open up as the frustrated staff stood outside and took it in turns struggling to make the right-handed key turn in the right-handed lock of the (ironically) right handed door.

Further problems arose in the left-handed Mail Order department - source of over half the shop’s income - because infuriated Despatch Officer Matthew Oakley found the tape-gun and franking machine impossible to operate. Profits plummeted and the shop opened for the final time last Friday.

Is disability-based retail fundamentally flawed?

Since this article was written, we are sorry to report that the Red-Headed Store in Dundee has also been forced to close due to wild temper-tantrums and day-long arguments between its orange-top staff and strawberry blonde customers.
 

Twila

Nanah Potato
Mar 26, 2003
14,698
73
48
RE: For the left handed..

60% left. 40% right.

I wonder how much of my score is because I was raised in a right handed family?

Imagine....if you could have grown up in a left handed family doing left handed things.....ah...to dream.....
 

peapod

Hall of Fame Member
Jun 26, 2004
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Twinks same for me 8O

Being left-handed is officially cool! Just look at this list of famous left-handed people: Brad Pitt, Nicole Kidman, John McEnroe, Leonardo da Vinci, Michelangelo

mmmmmmm.....I wonder if johnny depp or clive owens is a lefty....I will have to ride off and find out.......

oh by way all lefties...perhaps you should join the left handers club

just in....hot off the teletype....

http://www.left-handersday.com/register.html
 

Wetcoast40

Electoral Member
Feb 21, 2005
159
0
16
Lesser Vancouver
RE: For the left handed..

Peapod, the BBC link is absolute rubbish. Don't believe a word of it. Probably written by a righthander to boot! Lefthandedness is pathological, not genetic. Perhaps the only conclusion one can draw from the mix of stereotypes and myths that surround we 'lefties' is that we truly are immensely clever in order to survive and thrive in a righthanded world.
Blahhhhttt!
 

Wetcoast40

Electoral Member
Feb 21, 2005
159
0
16
Lesser Vancouver
RE: For the left handed..

PS: Twila, almost all lefthanders are raised in righthanded families. Statistics don't lie. 13% of 13% divided by two (assumes two parents) = .00845 or less than one percent.
We truly are alone!
 

peapod

Hall of Fame Member
Jun 26, 2004
10,745
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36
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Yikes! coaster...I hope bigH does not see what you wrote about his beloved BBC 8O Oi! now what will I do...side with one of my own....(a coaster) or with bigh...supplier of awesome liverpool bands! a ponder indeed! Perhaps I can play both sides...I am after all sinister :twisted: .....yes okay...thats what I will do...I with you coaster...its nuttin but rubbish....

* talk to later bigh :wink: *

bwhahahhaahhahaha!
 

Twila

Nanah Potato
Mar 26, 2003
14,698
73
48
RE: For the left handed..

PS: Twila, almost all lefthanders are raised in righthanded families. Statistics don't lie. 13% of 13% divided by two (assumes two parents) = .00845 or less than one percent.
We truly are alone!

I'd gotten use to that.....But that last line...."we truely are alone" has sent shivers up my spine.....yikes! Maybe we should start a club....a special club....
 

Wetcoast40

Electoral Member
Feb 21, 2005
159
0
16
Lesser Vancouver
RE: For the left handed..

Pea, you must be referring to the Children's BBC which is distinctly different than the Grownups BBC. The Children's BBC is run by Polly Toynbee, a Socialistic Mama of the first order. Never let the facts get in the way of a good story.
The Beeb, on the other hand, is run by Richardson, a wannabe Conservative, ready to snap the wayward Corp back into line. I think he's Lefthanded. Ms. Toynbee, on the other hand, is just Pathalogical.
Burp, sorry, Pardon Me.
PS: Who the heck is H?
 

Bubble

Nominee Member
Jun 22, 2005
90
0
6
I heard somewhere that some babys are twins then one dissapears and that the same percentage or dispearing twins is the same percentage of left handed people.