Phone Conversations

Reverend Blair
So my phone rang just now.

Disembodied Voice: Mr. Campbell? (it always pays to have your phone in somebody else's name)

Me: Nope, he's dead actually...a tragic accident involving a jack-all, six gnomes and a ....

D.V. Is Mrs. Campbell there?

Me: Actually she just went to the wake. I hear it's going to be quite a shindig. Jello shots and the whole deal, I spent half the night spinning quirlies for....

D.V.: Is there an adult there I can speak to?

Me: Apparently not. I took the adult oath a while back, but I'm having second th....

D.V. Are you over 18 sir?

Me: Yeah, I guess....I mean the wolves weren't big on birthdays or anything and they sucked at math but.....

D.V.: I'd like to ask you a few questions, sir.

Me: Ya know, I've got some questions too. I wanna know where my flying car is and why we don't have robot maids and while we're on the subject of robot maids I wanna know if Rosie from the Jetsons had "special" attachments if you know what I...

D.V.: Sir? I have some questions about your radio listening preferences.

Me: Radio? That's what the aliens use to to steal our thoughts. Are you trying to steal my thoughts?

D.V.: click
There is no way on earth I'd be able to carry on that conversation without laughing!

The best I can do is sound like a teenybopper so they'll ask to speak to my parents who conveniently are never home.
Rev, you ROCK!
a long time ago, pea told me how to handle those pesky phone calls from people wanting 'stuff'....basically sounds like your formula rev, she just kept bombarding the poor guy with questions til finally he just hung up!
Not F**king Interested and hang up They never phone back
ha! good one mom, direct and to the point!

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