Her Diary - His Diary

Her Diary - His Diary

Goober

#1Feb 27th, 2010

HER DIARY
Sunday night I thought he was acting weird.
We had made plans to meet at a bar to have a drink. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment.
Conversation wasn't flowing so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk, he agreed but he kept quiet and aloof.
I asked him what was wrong - he said, "Nothing." I asked him if it was my fault that he was up set. He said it had nothing to do with me and not to worry.
On the way home I told him that I loved him, he simply smiled and kept driving. I can't explain his behavior; I don't know why he didn't say, "I love you, too."
When we got home I felt as if I had lost him, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there and watched TV; he seemed distant and vacant. Finally I decided to go to bed.
About 10 minutes later he came to bed and to my surprise he responded to my caress and we made love, but I still felt that his thoughts were somewhere else.
I decided that I could not take it anymore, so I decided to confront him with the situation but he had fallen asleep. I started crying and cried until I also fell asleep. I don't know what to do. I'm almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.

HIS DIARY
Today the Flames lost, .......... but at least I got laid!

selin

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

man is man as usual wherever he comes from, whoever he is

AnnaG

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

A 54 year old mathmetician left his wife a note that said, "When you get this message, I'll be at the Grand Hotel with my 18 year old secretary." The wife faxed him at the hotel with the following message, "When you get this your 54 year old wife will be at home with an 18 year old boy toy. Being a mathmetician you know that 18 will go into 54 a whole lot more than 54 will go into 18."

El Barto

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

Sob lol

AnnaG

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

After being away on business, Tim thought it would be nice to bring his wife a little gift. "How about some perfume?" he asked the cosmetics clerk. She showed him a $50.00 bottle. "That's a bit much," said Tim, so she returned with a smaller bottle for $30.00. "That's still quite a bit," Tim complained.
Growing annoyed, the clerk brought out a tiny $15.00 bottle. "What I mean," said Tim, "is I'd like to see something really cheap."
The clerk handed him a mirror.

El Barto

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

Quote: Originally Posted by AnnaG

A 54 year old mathmetician left his wife a note that said, "When you get this message, I'll be at the Grand Hotel with my 18 year old secretary." The wife faxed him at the hotel with the following message, "When you get this your 54 year old wife will be at home with an 18 year old boy toy. Being a mathmetician you know that 18 will go into 54 a whole lot more than 54 will go into 18."

HAHAHHHAHAHAAaa

AnnaG

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

Quote: Originally Posted by El Barto

Sob lol

aaawww
*Anna hugs Bart*

and laughs

AnnaG

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

There is a man who has three girlfriends, but he does not know which one to marry. So he decides to give each one $5000 and see how each of them spends it. The first one goes out and gets a total makeover with the money. She gets new clothes, a new hairdo, manicure, pedicure, the works, and tells the man, "I spent the money so I could look pretty for you because I love you so much."
The second one went out and bought new golf clubs, a CD player, a television, and a stereo and gives them to the man. She says, "I bought these gifts for you with the money because I love you so much."
The third one takes the $5000 and invests it in the stock market, doubles her investment, returns the $5000 to the man and reinvests the rest. She says, "I am investing the rest of the money for our future because I love you so much."
The man thought long and hard about how each of the women spent the money, and decided to marry the one with the biggest breasts.

selin

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

Quote: Originally Posted by AnnaG

A 54 year old mathmetician left his wife a note that said, "When you get this message, I'll be at the Grand Hotel with my 18 year old secretary." The wife faxed him at the hotel with the following message, "When you get this your 54 year old wife will be at home with an 18 year old boy toy. Being a mathmetician you know that 18 will go into 54 a whole lot more than 54 will go into 18."

good answer...women are always luckier for those kind of things.

AnnaG

#10

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

"It's just to hot to wear clothes today," said Jack as he stepped out of the shower. "Honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?" "Probably that I married you for your money."

El Barto

#11

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

Quote: Originally Posted by AnnaG

aaawww
*Anna hugs Bart*

and laughs

What part did you grab that made you laugh ????

AnnaG

#12

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

As a painless way to save money, a young couple arranged that every time they have sex the husband puts his pocket change into a china piggy bank on the bedside table. One night while being unusually athletic, he accidentally knocked the bank to the floor where it smashes. To his surprise, among the masses of coins, there are handfuls of five and ten dollar bills. He asks his wife what's up. "Well," she replied, "Not everyone is as cheap as you are."

AnnaG

#13

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

If Men Were to Rewrite "The Rules" Rule # 1
Anything we said six or eight months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments become null and void after seven days.
Rule # 2
If you don't want to dress like Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.
Rule # 3
If we say something that can be interpreted in two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other way.
Rule # 4
It is in neither your best interest or ours to make us take those stupid Cosmo quizzes together.
Rule # 5
Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women how can we know how pretty you are?
Rule # 6
Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.
Rule # 7
You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done - not both.
Rule # 8
Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials or time-outs.
Rule # 9
Christopher Columbus didn't need directions and neither do we.
Rule # 10
When we're turning the wheel and the car is nosing onto the off ramp, you saying "This is our exit" is not necessary.

If women were to rewrite "the rules":

Rule #1. Get used to losing.

selin

#14

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

Quote: Originally Posted by AnnaG

As a painless way to save money, a young couple arranged that every time they have sex the husband puts his pocket change into a china piggy bank on the bedside table. One night while being unusually athletic, he accidentally knocked the bank to the floor where it smashes. To his surprise, among the masses of coins, there are handfuls of five and ten dollar bills. He asks his wife what's up. "Well," she replied, "Not everyone is as cheap as you are."

Anna you will make men mad

AnnaG

#15

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

Quote: Originally Posted by El Barto

What part did you grab that made you laugh ????

AnnaG

#16

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

Quote: Originally Posted by selin

Anna you will make men mad

They started it. lol

El Barto

#17

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

Quote: Originally Posted by selin

Anna you will make men mad

I don't think so

AnnaG

#18

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

Never do housework. No man ever made love to a woman because the house was spotless. Remember you are known by the idiot you accompany.
Don't imagine you can change a man - unless he's in diapers.
What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door.
So many men - so many reasons not to sleep with any of them.
If they put a man on the moon - they should be able to put them all there.
Tell him you're not his type - you have a pulse.
Never let your man's mind wander - it's too little to be let out alone.
The only reason men are on this planet is that vibrators can't dance or buy drinks. (Personally I think the dancing is debatable on most men).
Never sleep with a man who's named his willy.
Go for younger men. You might as well - they never mature anyway.
A man who can dress himself without looking like Wurzel Gummidge is unquestionably gay.
Men are all the same - they just have different faces so you can tell them apart.
Definition of a bachelor; a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.
Women don't make fools of men - most of them are the do-it-yourself types.
The best way to get a man to do something is to suggest they are too old for it.
Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
If you want a committed man look in a mental hospital.
The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in biblical times men wouldn't ask for directions.
If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him cheque books.
A man's idea of serious commitment is usually, 'oh alright, I'll stay the night".
Women sleep with men, who if they were women, they wouldn't even have bothered to have lunch with.
Remember a sense of humour does not mean that you tell him jokes, it means you laugh at his.
If he asks you if you're faking it tell him no, you're just practising.
Sadly, all men are created equal.
When he asks you if he's your first tell him, "You may be, you look familiar".
The main point of having a boyfriend is so that he can one day graduate to the exalted status of a 'former boyfriend".
There are two significant influences in a man's life and they are both his mother.
There are a lot of words that you can use to describe men - strong, caring, loving - they'd be wrong - but you could still use them.

El Barto

#19

Re: Her Diary - His Diary

Feb 27th, 2010

Quote: Originally Posted by AnnaG

HAHAHA you pest

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