2 funny, possibly offensive, jokes

1] there is a guy in the middle of a lake rowing his boat and counting. "One, two, three" and god is watching. God decides to take out a quarter of his brain so the guy is in the middle of a lake rowing and counting, "one, four, nine, seven, two," so god decides to take away another quarter of his brain so the guy is sitting in the middle of the laking rowing and saying "uh, uh, uh," so god decides to take away another quarter of his brain. The guy with 1/4 of his brain is sitting in the middle of the lake rowing his boat silently with a blank look on his face. God decides maybe he should just take the rest of his brain away and does. The guy is now sitting in the middle of the lake rowing and counting, "uno, dos, tres"

2] There is a fish in the water watching a fly and thinking 'if that fly drops 6 inches, im going to jump out of the water and eat it'. Meanwhile, a bear is watching the fly and thinking, ' if that fly drops six inches and the fish goes after it, im going to eat that fish.'A hunter is watching the fly thinking 'when that fly drops 6 inches, the fish will get it and the bear will go for the fish so ill shoot the bear'. A mouse is watching the fly and thinking ' when that fly drops 6 inches the fish will get it and the bear will get the fish and he hunter will get the bear and drop some cheese from his pocket and ill get the cheese'. A cat is watching the fly and thinking 'when that fly drops 6 inches, the fish will get it, the bear will get the fish, the hunter will get the bear, the mouse will get some cheese, and i will go out and get the mouse.' So, the fly drops 6 inches, the fish gets the fly, the bear gets the fish, the hunter gets the bear, the mouse gets the cheese, and the cat jumps at the mouse but misses and lands in the river. What is the moral of this story? Every time a fly drops six inches a pussy gets wet.

I dont get the first one....like I get it but I didnt know Italians were supposed to be a little dim! All Italians I've ever met are lovely!

But LOVE the second one!!!! Too damn funny!!! Thanks for the chuckle!

I think he's slamming the Mexican people. I just don't know why.

Ohh, isnt that Italian?? Whoops, my bad!