Tory scientists begin thawing cryogenically frozen John Diefenbaker for late leadersh

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Tory scientists begin thawing cryogenically frozen John Diefenbaker for late leadership run

CARP, ON – Deep inside the Diefenbunker, Conservative scientists have started the process of thawing a cryogenically frozen former Prime Minister to give their party a better shot at winning the 2019 election.

The Rt. Honourable John Diefenbaker (external - login to view), who has been immersed in liquid nitrogen for the past 37 years, was known for winning the largest majority government in Canadian history; a feat party insiders want repeated.

“After reviewing the field of registered candidates in the leadership race, there is little hope,” explained Dr. Vivian Thompson, a specialist at the secretive R.B. Bennett Cryogenics Lab. “Diefenbaker is not supposed to come out until 2151, but we really can’t afford another four years of a Trudeau government.”

The former Saskatchewan politician most notable for creating a Canadian Bill of Rights and cancelling the Avro Arrow project is expected to unite the Conservative Party with his populist appeal and fierce jowls.

“Our biggest challenge right now is ensuring his jowls stay intact after the thawing,” said Dr. Thompson. “But I really hope he’s forgotten about the Red Ensign thing.”

In related news, insiders at the NDP obtained an ancient pagan spell book in hopes of bringing back the late Tommy Douglas.

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I wonder if they are going to defrost Bob Stanfield too. What a team!

Curious Cdn
Quote: Originally Posted by MurphyView Post

I wonder if they are going to defrost Bob Stanfield too. What a team!

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Quote has been trimmed, See full post: View Post
Oh, bruvva.

If they thawed out Pierre Elliot Trudeau, they'd also have to remove the stake that was (hopefully) driven through his heart.
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Diefenbaker got them their largest majority to date. Worth a shot.
So that wasn't his grave I walked past everyday at UofS? I knew it was cold in S'toon but never knew it was that cold.
it sounds like a good idea to me, there';s certainly nothing in our future
Canada's Nixon
Bar Sinister
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Finally, a Conservative that I like.
Free Thinker
his body was so cold, BC had to adopt the use of fossil fuels
Is he supposed to be the last honest Politician we ever had?The one that kept us out of the invasion of Iraq was a pretty decent leader.
Quote: Originally Posted by DanbonesView Post

his body was so cold, BC had to adopt the use of fossil fuels

He is buried in SK. Cheaper to keep frozen.
Probably couldn't export him as he was labeled as a toxic waste.
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It would be a mistake to awaken him now, as he was only to be awoken for the end times....

That would make it right on schedule then eh boys?? What mic button? . . . shit.

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