A spanked child may be a better adult
- Thread starter JLM
- Start date
i was spanked as a youngin, and i dont blame or accuse my parents of anything. When i was younger then 6 yrs old, timeouts didnt work but when i got spanked i sure as hell learned my lesson.
A little spanking here and there isnt what i consider beating. Mabye i used to wrong choice of words....
A little spanking here and there isnt what i consider beating. Mabye i used to wrong choice of words....
Some people see only black or white. Unfortunately, they're also the same people who make the most noise.
Anyone here old enough to remember having to go and cut their own switch?
Nah, never had to, the old man always had one handy. Kids were tough in those days. :lol::lol::lol:
Anyone here old enough to remember having to go and cut their own switch?
My Dad used an unwound coat hanger.
I have never raised my hand to my kids, thought about it a few times. If you have patience things can be worked out in other ways. However, I can see how a slight spanking can have an effect.
Sparents in the "good old days" just went to far.....including my Dad.
My old man maintained a man's hand is too heavy to strike a child, but he was no slouch with the switch either, with Mother it was the hairbrush. But either way we behaved.
My Dad only once gave me a good swat on the butt with a loose leather mitt when I had hit my younger sister....It didn't hurt...just my pride....but what he said "A real man never hits a female"....stayed with me forever.
OUCH! Yeah, my Dad's calloused hand (he was a farmer)did the trick quite well. I can still remember those chilling words from my Mum, 'You just wait till your Dad gets home!" :-(
I was spanked as a child and would say I had it coming farm/bush kid me and my cousins usually caused some havoc with sisters or livestock, in the end we all turned out ok.
One thing I think about is how all our mothers were at home when we were young and we had to do chores pack wood, weed gardens, mow lawn 2acre push, shovel snow ect.. and how today it is rare to see a parent either mom or dad at home and I see even on the local farms kids do less they use equipment to shovel snow or riding lawn more to mow and think there is a coalition with the kids coming up today ie. no structure or discipline Just a thought
One thing I think about is how all our mothers were at home when we were young and we had to do chores pack wood, weed gardens, mow lawn 2acre push, shovel snow ect.. and how today it is rare to see a parent either mom or dad at home and I see even on the local farms kids do less they use equipment to shovel snow or riding lawn more to mow and think there is a coalition with the kids coming up today ie. no structure or discipline Just a thought
You know, I may be a 'supporter' (if you choose to say it that way), of parents' right to spank within reason, but, give me a freaking break. Since when is attending university, and behaving or getting good grades in school, a measure of whether or not one person is 'better' than the other.
Someone who doesn't spank is typically raising their child with an attitude of freedom, individuality, and non-conformity. We raise our children to fit our social desires and needs to some extent. If their children then grow up with that attitude, how is that 'worse' than the parents who raised their kids with a more regimented view of the world?
I'm sorry, but variety is necessary in life. Parents come in a variety, and their kids will too. What a surprise! Maybe I should write a lame journal article.
Someone who doesn't spank is typically raising their child with an attitude of freedom, individuality, and non-conformity. We raise our children to fit our social desires and needs to some extent. If their children then grow up with that attitude, how is that 'worse' than the parents who raised their kids with a more regimented view of the world?
I'm sorry, but variety is necessary in life. Parents come in a variety, and their kids will too. What a surprise! Maybe I should write a lame journal article.
I am all for variety in life I do not think my parents spanked me to be an automaton but to show me some basic rights and wrong the man who beats his wife or any another person period could argue then he is expressing him self as an individual but we know that is not so .
My parents always allowed me to express my individuality and I am very different than my two sisters.
thank them for the structure which has helped me become who I am but by no means did it define me as a person just as I am sure all who have been spanked are not the same as I
My parents always allowed me to express my individuality and I am very different than my two sisters.
thank them for the structure which has helped me become who I am but by no means did it define me as a person just as I am sure all who have been spanked are not the same as I
It seems to me that common sense was on its way out the door just as "time outs" were on the way in. I remember a church minister (a.k.a. a "social engineer") at a Christmas cocktail party 25 years ago telling me - as my first daughter was a month away from making her premiere - to make sure I never spanked the child. I remember saying something about minding his own business, sparing the rod & spoiling the child, and I think I might have even mentioned that advice from someone whose parenting experience was limited to reading books was pretty shaky, and I probably had a few other responses. He decided to go elsewhere to impart his "vast knowledge and sage advice" on someone else.
In those days, it was quite fashionable to condemn anyone that might lay a hand on their child as being abusive. Mind you, that was in the politically-correct suburbs of Toronto, where everyone seemed to have an opinion on how other people should live, and they weren't too shy about expressing it. As time went on, I was able to witness the fruits of their efforts...the pre-school and early grade school classes were loaded with kids that said the most surprising and disrespectful things to their teachers.
I guess my take on spanking is that some kids need it, and some don't. I was one of 4 kids, and I seemed to "need it" more than my older brother. I'm sure I was spanked twice as many times as him, but I later figured out that his listening skills were on a slightly higher level than mine...when he was told to refrain from bending the spokes on my bicycle wheels with one of Dad's hammers, he would comply. On the other hand, I was prone to keep on doing it until said spokes were completely removed. This would be cause for a spanking.
I think I eventually figured out that if I did what I was told, behaved myself to a reasonable standard, showed some respect for other people and their property, and didn't back-talk people who were older than me and/or in charge of the situation, then I would avoid a spanking. It took a while, but the spankings eventually ceased.
I think it worked for me.
I have 2 daughters...one was only spanked once, as I recall, while the other was a bit more like her Dad...took a bit longer for things to sink in, but they did. She always understood the reasons for the spankings, and they were never administered with raging anger, but certainly with a sense of firmness and purpose.
I think spanking is one way to get the child's attention (usually a last resort thing) and helps them to ultimately understand the difference between right and wrong. Used selectively and with thought, spankings are a very helpful training tool, in my opinion.
Of course, it's up to the parents as to how they feel and what they do with their own kids in terms of their upbringing.
My opinion is that the vast majority of parents would not abuse their children, but there are exceptions where real abuse takes place. I'm not talking about spankings as I've known them, but physical punishment and abuse. That's a horse of a different color and needs to be dealt with by society. Going overboard and making spanking illegal ain't the way though. Sweeping legislation as a response to a problem of limited scope has a habit of causing many other problems, such as unbalancing the authority/responsibility ratio of a parent's job.
Hell, some people should probably never have children but I've never been able to come up with a practical suggestion as to how to manage that one.
In those days, it was quite fashionable to condemn anyone that might lay a hand on their child as being abusive. Mind you, that was in the politically-correct suburbs of Toronto, where everyone seemed to have an opinion on how other people should live, and they weren't too shy about expressing it. As time went on, I was able to witness the fruits of their efforts...the pre-school and early grade school classes were loaded with kids that said the most surprising and disrespectful things to their teachers.
I guess my take on spanking is that some kids need it, and some don't. I was one of 4 kids, and I seemed to "need it" more than my older brother. I'm sure I was spanked twice as many times as him, but I later figured out that his listening skills were on a slightly higher level than mine...when he was told to refrain from bending the spokes on my bicycle wheels with one of Dad's hammers, he would comply. On the other hand, I was prone to keep on doing it until said spokes were completely removed. This would be cause for a spanking.
I think I eventually figured out that if I did what I was told, behaved myself to a reasonable standard, showed some respect for other people and their property, and didn't back-talk people who were older than me and/or in charge of the situation, then I would avoid a spanking. It took a while, but the spankings eventually ceased.
I think it worked for me.
I have 2 daughters...one was only spanked once, as I recall, while the other was a bit more like her Dad...took a bit longer for things to sink in, but they did. She always understood the reasons for the spankings, and they were never administered with raging anger, but certainly with a sense of firmness and purpose.
I think spanking is one way to get the child's attention (usually a last resort thing) and helps them to ultimately understand the difference between right and wrong. Used selectively and with thought, spankings are a very helpful training tool, in my opinion.
Of course, it's up to the parents as to how they feel and what they do with their own kids in terms of their upbringing.
My opinion is that the vast majority of parents would not abuse their children, but there are exceptions where real abuse takes place. I'm not talking about spankings as I've known them, but physical punishment and abuse. That's a horse of a different color and needs to be dealt with by society. Going overboard and making spanking illegal ain't the way though. Sweeping legislation as a response to a problem of limited scope has a habit of causing many other problems, such as unbalancing the authority/responsibility ratio of a parent's job.
Hell, some people should probably never have children but I've never been able to come up with a practical suggestion as to how to manage that one.
Yep, I was a farm kid too and those chores not only helped out my over-worked Mum and Dad but they taught me the value of work and being responsible.
Structure and discipline are, IMHO, paramount to raising a child. Parents must provide boundaries and rules in order for a child to understand that there are limits and consequences to their behaviour - just another thought. :smile:
"Hell, some people should probably never have children but I've never been able to come up with a practical suggestion as to how to manage that one."- Not that you could sell to the public anyway..............LOl Excellent post CB (you slept in a bit this morning?)
Yeah, I've been fighting a sinusitis thing but finally had a good sleep last night, for a change. Weather's been too warm for my sinuses, but it's getting back to normal and I think I feel better. As a Manitoba-born guy, my body thinks that warm weather in winter is wrong, so it reacts badly to these warm spells.
I might have to give myself a spanking to straighten things out! Oops, that sounds a bit kinky...8O