How to React to a Terrorist Attack in Canada

Locutus

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Jun 18, 2007
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With so many Americans planning on moving to Canada after Donald Trump wins the election, and terrorist attacks worldwide increasing (for no reason whatsoever), it’s time to brush up on the Canadian way to respond when one of these terror attacks happen.


How to React to a Terrorist Attack in Canada

Posted by License To Shill on Jun 12, 2016

With so many Americans planning on moving to Canada after Donald Trump wins the election, and terrorist attacks worldwide increasing (for no reason whatsoever), it’s time to brush up on the Canadian way to respond when one of these terror attacks happen.


Step 1: Act Confused as to the Cause of the Attack


Don’t let common sense or history dictate the possible cause of this terror attack. Ensure that you pretend to be completely oblivious to the potential causes, even after facts start coming out that the attacker is named “Omar” or “Mohammed,” or even that they shouted “Allah Akbar” before the attack took place. This attack could be anyone and your first thoughts should be “White Right-Wing Extremist,” no matter the context.

The media may try to speculate that this terror attack is connected to a radical terror group such as ISIS or Al Qaeda. You must alternate between declaring that these terrorist groups have nothing to do with Islam, and chastising the media for jumping the gun before 100% proof comes out. At this point the fact that ISIS is claiming responsibility for the attack should have no bearing on your opinion about who is responsible.



Step 2: Blame Conservative Issues

Despite not being allowed to speculate on the national origin of the terrorists or their religion, you’re encouraged to blame traditional right wing issues for the attack. Blame it on nationalism or gun control and you don’t need facts to back that up. If there’s any possibility, no matter how remote, that there’s a connection to Christianity or white males immediately blame them. Maybe the Confederate Flag has something to do with this?

It’s also important at this point to declare the attacker mentally ill. You don’t need any kind of specialty training or knowledge of the person to realize that this shooter is motivated by their own mental illness and not their religion. Immediately counter any point brought up by others by declaring this mental illness as a known fact.


learn more here


How to react to a terrorist attack in Canada
 

Angstrom

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May 8, 2011
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With so many Americans planning on moving to Canada after Donald Trump wins the election, and terrorist attacks worldwide increasing (for no reason whatsoever), it’s time to brush up on the Canadian way to respond when one of these terror attacks happen.


How to React to a Terrorist Attack in Canada

Posted by License To Shill on Jun 12, 2016

With so many Americans planning on moving to Canada after Donald Trump wins the election, and terrorist attacks worldwide increasing (for no reason whatsoever), it’s time to brush up on the Canadian way to respond when one of these terror attacks happen.


Step 1: Act Confused as to the Cause of the Attack


Don’t let common sense or history dictate the possible cause of this terror attack. Ensure that you pretend to be completely oblivious to the potential causes, even after facts start coming out that the attacker is named “Omar” or “Mohammed,” or even that they shouted “Allah Akbar” before the attack took place. This attack could be anyone and your first thoughts should be “White Right-Wing Extremist,” no matter the context.

The media may try to speculate that this terror attack is connected to a radical terror group such as ISIS or Al Qaeda. You must alternate between declaring that these terrorist groups have nothing to do with Islam, and chastising the media for jumping the gun before 100% proof comes out. At this point the fact that ISIS is claiming responsibility for the attack should have no bearing on your opinion about who is responsible.



Step 2: Blame Conservative Issues

Despite not being allowed to speculate on the national origin of the terrorists or their religion, you’re encouraged to blame traditional right wing issues for the attack. Blame it on nationalism or gun control and you don’t need facts to back that up. If there’s any possibility, no matter how remote, that there’s a connection to Christianity or white males immediately blame them. Maybe the Confederate Flag has something to do with this?

It’s also important at this point to declare the attacker mentally ill. You don’t need any kind of specialty training or knowledge of the person to realize that this shooter is motivated by their own mental illness and not their religion. Immediately counter any point brought up by others by declaring this mental illness as a known fact.


learn more here


How to react to a terrorist attack in Canada

Blame it on residential schools, and the cultural genocid.
 

TenPenny

Hall of Fame Member
Jun 9, 2004
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Location, Location
A more Canadian way is what we've done in the past: pretend it never happened. We all seem to forget about the Air India bombing, and pretend it didn't invole our country.
 

captain morgan

Hall of Fame Member
Mar 28, 2009
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A Mouse Once Bit My Sister
A more Canadian way is what we've done in the past: pretend it never happened. We all seem to forget about the Air India bombing, and pretend it didn't invole our country.


There's always the tried and true solution in accounting for the violence as some people feeling excluded... Follow that up with a joke about losing a hockey game and you got 'er covered
 

Jinentonix

Hall of Fame Member
Sep 6, 2015
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Olympus Mons
A more Canadian way is what we've done in the past: pretend it never happened. We all seem to forget about the Air India bombing, and pretend it didn't invole our country.
Hell, if you're a "true" Canadian, you'll even attend their annual parade.